Writing task 2 - cam 18 - please help me correct my essay!

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Modern curriculum require students to absorb a lot of information and knowledge. Some students are eager to study more supplemental subjects apart from specialized subjects, while others show that it is more essential to concentrate on learning main courses specifically to future careers. This essay agrees that additional subjects will be more beneficial for students in providing multi-discipline understanding, and better adaption to currently complicated landscape.
Studying additional subjects can equip students with useful skills for their careers that cannot be provided by core subjects. The courses involved to soft skills teach students how to manage time effectively, make an influential presentation, or encourage and nurture entrepreneurship even while the students are still in school. It is therefore agreed that many students pay much attention to these subjects because of their necessity and utility for the advancement in their future career path. With the perception of their inevitability, The Educational Department of Vietnam allows all universities in the system to include soft-skill courses in the undergraduate curriculum, so that every student can learn and experience, regardless of profession.
However, many disagrees and reveal that the specialized subjects are more necessary and students should focus on them if they want to be an expert in the pursued fields. The main courses are usually difficult and require a great endeavour form learners to gain expertise in a field with limited training time – 3,5 years for undergraduates, and 1,5 years for postgraduates. Despite this, to solve the currently complicated issues, students must have multidisciplinary comprehension. For instance, how to sale and launch a marketing campaign for the new products after invention is a dilemma for engineering students. As a result of this, the trend of educating multidiscipline has become popular in many universities in the world, in which students are permitted to graduate with two or more certificates depending on their wishes.
In conclusion, while additional subjects provide supplementary awareness for students’ career development, other people believe students should try their best to be good at core subjects because they are determinants whether students can acquire the certifications they desire. However, students only receive rounded education when they can study any subjects that they see applicable and useful for their future careers irrespective of specialized, or non-specialized subjects.

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The modern curriculum requires students to absorb a great deal of information and knowledge. Some students are eager to study more supplementary subjects apart from specialised subjects, while others show that it is more essential to concentrate on learning core subjects specifically for future careers. This essay agrees that additional subjects will be more beneficial for students to gain a multidisciplinary understanding and better adapt to the current complicated landscape.
Studying additional subjects can equip students with useful skills for their careers that cannot be provided by core subjects. Soft skills courses teach students how to manage their time effectively, how to give an influential presentation or how to encourage and nurture an entrepreneurial spirit while they are still at school. It is therefore agreed that many students pay much attention to these subjects because of their necessity and usefulness for advancement in their future careers. Recognising their inevitability, the Ministry of Education of Vietnam allows all universities in the system to include soft skills courses in the undergraduate curriculum so that every student can learn and experience them, regardless of their profession.
However, many disagree and say that the specialised subjects are more necessary and students should focus on them if they want to become experts in their chosen fields. The main courses are usually difficult and require a great deal of effort from the learner in order to gain expertise in a field with limited training time - 3.5 years for undergraduates and 1.5 years for postgraduates.
However, in order to solve today’s complicated problems, students need to have a multidisciplinary understanding. For example, how to sell and launch a marketing campaign for the new products after invention is a dilemma for engineering students. As a result, the trend of multidisciplinary education has become popular in many universities around the world, where students are allowed to graduate with two or more certificates according to their wishes.
In conclusion, while some people believe that additional subjects provide additional awareness for students’ career development, others believe that students should do their best to be good at core subjects because they are the determinants of whether students can obtain the certificates they want. However, students will only receive a well-rounded education if they are able to study all subjects that they consider applicable and useful for their future careers, regardless of whether they are specialised or non-specialised.

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Your essay presents a thoughtful discussion on the importance of additional subjects in education. It effectively outlines the benefits of incorporating soft-skill courses, emphasizing their practical utility for students in their future careers. The mention of Vietnam’s Educational Department’s initiative to include such courses in university curricula adds a relevant real-world context.

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