This is my IELTS essay. Could you please rate it for me?
Thank you a lot.
Topic: What are the pros and cons of using public transportation?
Nowadays, more and more people prefer taking public transport rather than using their own car. However, there are a lot of positives and negatives about using public transport. In this essay, I will discuss both views of it.
On the one hand, public transport is beneficial for both countries and individuals. Firstly, public transport can help to decrease significant quantities of private vehicles and exhaust fumes from them as well. This contributes to reduce air pollution causing global warming which may have devastating effect on our environment. Secondly, investment in public facilities, particularly transportation system, will ease traffics congestion as people are encouraged to travel by buses and trains instead of driving. Finally, modern public transport is often fast and cheap, which will bring out saving time and money on transit for everyone.
On the other hands, it is inconvenient to have access to public transport because of some reasons. Buses and trains are often slow and unreliable; as a result, commuters will show up non-punctually or even delay their important events. For instance, last month, most of Singaporean pupils were late to get to school for the final examination in secondary schools due to train disruption and they had to take the exam later. Moreover, people often feel like “sardine in can” as using metro system in the rush hours, which is not as comfortable as driving their own cars. In addition, public places are becoming insecure because of a possible threat of terrorism, which is not safe for travelers taking public transportation.
In conclusion, there are both advantages and disadvantages of public transport that people should consider before travelling by them regularly.
Hi Lishichen, I thought you did a good job with this essay. You have addressed the prompt correctly and your writing is clear and natural sounding for the most part.
In your introduction, I would try not to repeat “public transportation”
in your first sentence - maybe say “prefer taking buses, subways and other alternative modes of transportation other than …” And then your second sentence does not really flow that smoothly. Maybe “As this trend intensifies, accordingly there are many positives as well as negatives that arise. In this essay, I will discuss both the benefits and drawbacks to utilizing public transportation.”} Your body paragraphs seemed to flow better, showing good use of transition words. Your words are used correctly, but using a few more complex words would be helpful. Overall, I don’t think it is quite at the band 7 level yet. Here are some specific suggestions: