I wrote this essay in real timing ( 3 min. for reading and 20 min. for writing).
So, I haven’t re-edited my work at all after the time is up. >_<
Could you please give me some feedback?
P.S. After review, I have seen a lot of grammatical mistakes. >_<
I think I must set aside time for review my writing next time.
The reading passage
The listening passage
My response
The author believes that there is a correlation between rewarding system and productivity. The reward system tends to influence employees to improve their performance and productivity. On the other hand, the speaker disagree with the idea that the reward system will help encourage employees to increase the productivity.
The author explains that the many rewarding techniques utilized to motivate employees to increase their performance and productivity works effectively. The types of rewardings are not necessary. The company can set any types of rewards to motivate their associates. Furthermore, the author believes that the reward system will also build up employees’ positive attitude towards their work and their company.
On the other hand, the speaker casts doubt on the reward system. He thinks that this system does not work for motivating people. In addition, employees usually consider the rewarding technique as a punishment. The employees will feel like they are being manipulated and controlled by the company. To illustration, an employee works so hard in order to get a reward, but he failed in the end and miss that reward, he may think that it is not fair because he had contributed a lot of his work and had a great performance. Additionally, the reward system tends to reduce collaboration among employees and employees tends to conceal problems in order to prevent negative rating from their boss. Consequently, this could reduce the overall performance and productivity.
The author believes that the reward system will help improve performance and productivity of employees. However, the speaker disagree. He thinks that this system will subotage the company, reduce employees’ morale, performance and productivity.
TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture on agriculture
I wrote this essay in real timing ( 3 min. for reading and 20 min. for writing).
So, I haven’t re-edited my work at all after the time is up. >_<
Could you please give me some feedback?
P.S. After review, I have seen a lot of grammatical mistakes. >_<
I think I must set aside time for review my writing next time.
The reading passage
The listening passage
My response
The author believes that there is a correlation between rewarding system and productivity. The reward system tends to influence employees to improve their performance and productivity. On the other hand, the speaker disagree with the idea that the reward system will help encourage employees to increase the productivity.
The author explains that the many rewarding techniques utilized to motivate employees to increase their performance and productivity works effectively. The types of rewardings are not necessary. The company can set any type of rewards to motivate their associates. Furthermore, the author believes that the reward system will also build up employees’ positive attitudes towards their work and their company.
On the other hand, the speaker casts doubt on the reward system. He thinks that this system does not work in motivating people. In addition, employees usually consider the rewarding technique as a punishment. The employees will feel like they are being manipulated and controlled by the company. To illustration, an employee works so hard in order to get a reward, but he failed in the end and miss that reward, he may think that it is not fair because he had contributed a lot of his work and had a great performance. Additionally, the reward system tends to reduce collaboration among employees and employees tends to conceal problems in order to prevent negative rating from their boss. Consequently, this could reduce the overall performance and productivity.
The author believes that the reward system will help improve the performance and productivity of employees. However, the speaker disagree. He thinks that this system will sabotage the company, reduce employees’ morale, performance and productivity.
…
In spite of your negative opinion, I thought this was damned good Aonz. So good in fact, that you are getting the stars.
Kitos. 10/10 *****
Yahoo!
Thanks you much for your stars. 
I will consider your stars as an incentive, not a stop.
Currently, I would like to focus more on the integrated writing because its style is quite different from the independent writing.
However, I will hand in independent essays some time.
Thanks again
Aonz
Hi Bug_Aonz!
You made some mistakes:
On the other hand, the speaker DISAGREES with the idea that the reward system will help encourage employees to increase the productivity.
The employees will feel like they are being manipulated and controlled by the company. To illustration, an employee works so hard in order to get a reward, but he failed in the end and miss that reward(.) HE may think that it is not fair because he had contributed a lot of his work and had a great performance.
Additionally, the reward system tends to reduce collaboration among employees(,) and employees tends to conceal problems in order to prevent negative rating from their boss.
However, the speaker DISAGREES
I think 10/10***** was too generous for you. :))
Hope this will help!
NGU.
Thanks for your correction.
But if you read my comment first, you will see that Kitosdad and I already know that there are some mistakes and I intend to leave it as it was like a real test.
P.S. After review, I have seen a lot of grammatical mistakes. >_<
I think I must set aside time for review my writing next time.
Do you think that Kitosdad doesn’t know where I made mistakes? o_O
I don’t think so.
Anyway, thank for your constructive correction.
