Hello Everybody ;
[color=red]I have just started preparing for TOEFL and i have written my first essay in 30 minutes. Please Give me your suggestions reagarding any grammatical or structural mistakes. Alan please review my essay. Thanks a lot in advance for help.Also can you please tell me how much score this essay will get in TOEFL?
Write you agree or disagree the following statement. Advertising influences people’s behavior in a negative way.
Today’s world is growing at a very fast speed in all sectors whether it is computer science, biotechnology or aeronautical engineering. In this era the process of product development has become fast and effective. Because of this efficient development in production system everyday different kind of products are coming in to the market which are part of life of a general human being. The second phase after the development system is to generate interest in people to buy the product. For generating this attraction advertising is the best way which attraction in people for the product. The main mediums of advertising now a days are television, internet, banners, newspapers etc. But the major concern is whether these advertisements are really helpful for people or it makes people to go in a wrong way.
Advertising generally have a negative effect in people’s mind. As people just see the things presented to them they have never used the product on their own. Sometimes people are attracted to buy the product because the advertising is done so effectively that they are impressed by it. After buying the product and using it they finds that the thing they saw in the advertisement is not really the way it is.
Moreover people face the main problem for beauty products. Sometimes because of the ad seen on television people may be attracted towards a product that is not much important to their life of those may create negative impacts on the body.
Furthermore Medicine advertises shown in such a way that leads people to a thought that we don’t need a doctor for health problems. The advertises of medicine like aspirins are shown as a quick pain relief for headache. But it is dangerous to take it for a long period of time or to take in more quantity. The side effects of taking more does of aspirin are not shown to the people in advertisement which may really lead people to take aspirins whenever they face the headache.
Finally advertise of cigarettes shows a man smoking a cigarette as a confident and a successful person. This will create a wrong effect on teenagers and youth. Generally advertises are seen on television and in those advertisements the positive parts of product are shown but the negative impacts of those products on human body are not shown. Just like a hair color advertises they show the shiny hair when the hair colors of their company are used. Now after seeing the advertise on television the customer buys the product. But when the instructions are read on that it is found that it may also cause side effects on skin depending on the skin, which is not shown in the advertisement.
As a conclusion advertising directs people in a wrong way by directing them to buy wrong product so advertising has a negative effect on society.
TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between a student and his counselor