Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger

Over the last two decades, the child birth rate has been higher for women ages thirty to forty than that of women ages twenty to thirty . I believe this is a positive development, and this essay will discuss the reasons for this trend.
To begin, many people nowadays are ambitious and focused towards their goals. To achieve something in life, individuals have to allot a huge amount of time studying, practicing and learning something that could build their personality and the career, and the right age group is considered to be in the twenties.

If a person plans his family during this golden period, there are many possibilities that the aspirants could deviate their interests and shift their entire focus on building and taking care of the family. That means, a county could lose many professionals such as doctors, engineers and sportsmen.
Furthermore, some people think it is imperative to own a house and make fortune before a child in their life, and to achieve it people postpone their family plans. Moreover, people, especially men are considered immature when they are in the twenties. Having a child during their early stressful working life could affect them mentally, which could be devastating.

However, there are many people who consider the twenties as the right age to conceive a child because they believe the generation gap will be less and they can better understand their children and support them financially and physically.
In conclusion, Although there are some advantages of having a child at twenties, In my opinion, it is better to have a child at early thirties because one can get enough time to pursue an ambition, and also save enough money to have a healthy family life.

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Hello Kevinroshan, welcome to our forum and many thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. Your essay is quite good and it would help greatly if you could tell us what exactly you expect from us if anything.

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Hi…
It would be apreciated if someone could evaluate it.

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What kind of evalution do you expect?

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Actually I would be taking the IELTS test shortly. If you could correct my essay with regard to Grammar, structure and cohesion and suggest some improvement would be appreciated.

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Why are going to take the IELTS test? What exactly do you want to achieve in life?

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I am currently working in Kuwait and life here is pretty boring. So, planning to migrate, hopefully Australia.

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Sounds like a good plan. As for your question, you might want to read this: Is writing becoming obsolete? The Effect of AI on Writing and Standardized Testing

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