The happiest times of most people’s lives--Teenage or adult years

[Cathyxu]

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

May 22th, 2017 10:51-11:31
For the happiest time of the life, people have different opinions. Some believe the teenage years are the happiest time, while others think adult life brings more happiness, even though adults take more responsibilities. My happiest time is the teenage years.
For the people with the first opinion: Why they have more fun as teenagers rather than adults? There are a few reasons. Firstly, teenagers are new to many things, they have more opportunities to learn new things. As beginners, they are allowed to ask stupid questions, make mistakes, and speak freely of whatever in their mind. That explains why great discoveries and scientist findings are made when the scientists are at the very young age. When the apple fell onto 18-year-old Newton’s head, the question jumped into his mind: Why does the apple fall to the ground instead of the sky. Because of this “stupid question”, Newton found the gravity, the breakthrough discovery brought physics into a new era. Secondly, teenagers have fewer responsibilities, so they have fewer things to worry about: they do not worry about how to make ends meet, how to get along with the people, how to achieve success, ect. They are well protected by the parents, so most of their teenage years are made up of study and fun. Without the burden of the adult’s things, they enjoy more pure happiness. For example, every Friday night is the teenagers’ favorite night. Because as long as they finish all the homework, they have 2 days plus a night to have fun. But as an adult, even you finish your work and gets back home on Friday evening, you still have lots of things on your mind: laundry, shopping, cleaning, hanging out with dogs, gardening, making you feel tired.
Some people believe adult life are happier, even though they take greater responsibilities. This comes with some reasons. Suppose life is a small boat, adult are in steer of their own life boats. Yes, adults are more responsible, but on the other hand, they enjoy more freedom. Your parents, who used to be bossy around, now no longer in charge of your life. They cannot stop the decision you make after you live an independent life. For the newest fashions, you can wear the stylish things without the approval of your parents. People who love freedom feel happier for adult life.
In a conclusion, teenage years and adult life have its pros and cons. For me, I enjoy learning new things, and enjoy the burden-free time. believing teens are the happiest time of most people’s lives.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between a student and her coach

[Eugene2114]

Some small corrections that I’d make:

May 22nd
For[As to] the happiest time of the [one’s] life, people have different opinions. Some believe [the] teenage years are [is] the happiest time, while others think adult life brings more happiness, even though adults take more responsibilities. My happiest time is the teenage years.
For the people with the first opinion: Why [do] they have more fun as teenagers rather than adults? There are a few reasons [behind that]. Firstly, teenagers are new to many things, they have more opportunities to learn new things. As beginners, they are [‘allowed’] to ask stupid questions, make mistakes, and speak freely of whatever in their mind. That explains why great discoveries and scientist [scientific] findings [have been made]are made when the scientists are at the very young age.[?!] When the apple fell onto 18-year-old [are you sure he was 18 at that time?] Newton’s head, the question jumped into his mind: Why does the apple fall to the ground instead of the sky. Because of this “stupid question”, Newton found [formulated] the gravity [gravity law], the [a] breakthrough [discovery] [that] brought physics into a new era. Secondly, teenagers have fewer responsibilities, so they have fewer things to worry about: they do not worry about how to make ends meet, how to get along with [the] people, how to achieve success, ect. [etc.] They are well protected by the[ir] parents, so most of their teenage years are made up of study and fun. Without the burden of the adult[s’] things, they enjoy more pure happiness. For example, every Friday night is the teenagers’ favorite night. Because as long as they finish all the homework, they have 2 days plus a night to have fun. But as an adult, even [when] you finish your work and get[s] back home on Friday evening, you still have lots of things on your mind:[-- laundry, shopping, cleaning, hanging out with dogs, gardening–that make]laundry, shopping, cleaning, hanging out with dogs, gardening, making you feel tired.
Some people believe adult lives are happier, even though they take greater responsibilities. This comes with some reasons. [It stands to some reason. = this is logical to some extent]. Suppose life is a small boat*, adult[s] are in steer of their own life boats.** [Looking at life as a sailing in a boat, adults are at the steering wheel of their boats.] Yes, adults are more responsible, but on the other hand, they enjoy more freedom. Your parents, who used to be bossy [bossing] around, now no longer in charge of your life. They cannot stop the decision you make after [since you start living] you live an independent life. For [With] the newest fashions, you can wear the stylish things without the approval of your parents. People who love freedom feel happier for [in] adult life.
In [a] conclusion, teenage years and adult life have [each has] its pros and cons. [As for me]For me, I enjoy learning new things, and [enjoy] the burden-free time. believing teens are [is] the happiest time of most people’s lives.

*life is a boat–??
**life boat is a boat used for saving people’s lives.

[Luschen]

Hi, Eugene did a great job of correcting your essay, but I thought I would give my two cents as well. Your essay is quite good I think, though your topic sentences could be a bit stronger. You have a lot of good examples though. It seems pretty long for a IELTS essay, although I don’t think they mark you down for being too long.

@Cathyxu

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

May 22th, 2017 10:51-11:31
[As to] the happiest time of [one’s] life, people have different opinions. Some believe the teenage years are the happiest time, while others think adult life brings more happiness, even though adults take more responsibilities. My happiest time is the teenage years. {this is a bit unclear - you either mean “My happiest time was my teenage years.” or “In my opinion, the teenage years are the happiest time.”}
For the people with the first opinion: [w]hy [do] they have more fun as teenagers rather than adults? There are a few reasons. {I think this topic sentence is a little weak} Firstly, teenagers are new to many things[;] they have more opportunities to learn new things. As beginners, they are allowed to ask stupid questions, make mistakes, and speak freely of whatever in their mind. That explains why great discoveries and scienti[fic] findings are [often] made when the scientists are at the very young age. When the apple fell onto 18-year-old Newton’s head, the question jumped into his mind[, “]Why does the apple fall to the ground instead of the sky[?”] Because of this “stupid question”, Newton [discovered] gravity, the breakthrough discovery [that] brought physics into a new era. Secondly, teenagers have fewer responsibilities, so they have fewer things to worry about: they do not worry about how to make ends meet, how to get along with the people, how to achieve success, ect. {it is “etc”, but try to avoid abbreviations in essays like this} They are well protected by [their] parents, so most of their teenage years are made up of study and fun. Without the burden of the adult’s things{try to avoid using “things” - come up with a more specific word - here you could use “responsibilities”} , they enjoy more pure happiness. For example, every Friday night is the teenagers’ favorite night[, b]ecause as long as they finish all the[ir] homework, they have 2 days plus a night to have fun. But as an adult, even [if] you finish your work and [get] back home on Friday evening, you still have lots of [tasks] on your mind: laundry, shopping, cleaning, hanging out with [your] dogs, {just “hanging out with dogs” sounds odd, like you wander around town looking for dogs to hang out with } gardening, making you feel tired.
[In contrast,] Some people believe adult[s’ lives] are happier, even though they take greater responsibilities. This comes with some reasons. {maybe “this is supported by some reasons” is better} Suppose life is a small boat[;] adult[s ] are in steer [charge] {or to keep your metaphor - “adults are the navigators of …” or “adults can steer their own …”} of their own life boats. {I agree with Eugene that this is a bit unclear} Yes, adults are more responsible, but on the other hand, they enjoy more freedom. Your parents, who used to [boss you] around, now [are] no longer in charge of your life. They cannot stop the decision[s ] you make[, since] you live an independent life. For the newest fashions, you can wear the stylish [outfits] without the approval of your parents. People who love freedom feel happier [in their] adult li[ves].
In a conclusion, teenage years and adult life [each] have its pros and cons. For me, I enjoy learning new things, and enjoy the burden-free time. [So I believe the teenage period is] teens are the happiest time of most people’s lives.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between a student and her coach

[Eugene2114]

And now I feel pressed to give my two cents.

1—Why keep to ‘22th’?
2—I would retain ‘teenage years is the happiest time’ (=years as a period of time in one’s life)
3—Relying on: thefreedictionary.com/each, I’d stick with ‘teenage years and adult life each have their pros and cons’ pattern.

[Luschen]

@Eugene2114

And now I feel pressed to give my two cents.

1—Why keep to ‘22th’? - sorry, I didn’t even see this!
2—I would retain ‘teenage years is the happiest time’ (=years as a period of time in one’s life) - I guess my focus on this sentence was the “my” - I couldn’t tell if she is talking more about “my teenage years” or “my opinion”
3—Relying on: thefreedictionary.com/each, I’d stick with ‘teenage years and adult life each have their pros and cons’ pattern. - yes, I was incorrect on this one.

[Eugene2114]

Thank you Luschen.
I didn’t mean to nitpick or something, just checking my own grammar gaps. In this case, against your American ear.
To me, correcting someone else’s writings is much more demanding a job than writing your own—you should be perfect at it.
Putting it to bed, by “ I would retain ‘teenage years is the happiest time’ (=years as a period of time in one’s life)” I meant to say it should be ‘is’ not ‘are’ there. Teenage years are the happiest in one’s life but Teenage years is the happiest time of one’s life.
Would you agree?

[Luschen]

Hi Eugene, to me I think you would need a “the” - so “The teenage years is the happiest time of one’s life.” Maybe post this question on the grammar forum?