Some practical skills such as money management should- Ielts task 2

[Minooee]

Some practical skills such as money management should be taught in high school. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and real life examples.

Curriculum of schools has based on theoretical subject since the down of time. Throughout the history, there has been strong idea that students had better learn basics science. It is disagreed that some practical skills such as money management should be taught in high school since academic subjects are very important and life skill could be taught out of school.

Nowadays, we live in a knowledge-based economy where independent thinking and problem solving are the most important skills. These skills are output of academic subjects such as math, physics, and art and so on. It seems that devote all schools timetable on these subject have immensely positive effects on future life of students. According to an article which was published in Jam newspaper, people who are the best problem solver have great math background information because they could easily find a specific pattern based on mathematical theory for problems. Thus, allocating all time to teach such as important subject to student is difficult to debunk.

To addition to this, although life skills seem to be important as academic subjects, they have less value and could be learnt anywhere. In fact, Practical skills such as money management should be taught by parents not teachers and the best way to teach it is pocket money. For example, since I was in primary school, my father every week gave me a little money. I was entitled to spend all money on one day even on unnecessary stuff, however in this circumstance my father never charged me again until next week. So I had to manage my money. This example makes it clear that there are many ways to learn all sort of practical skills instead of learning them in schools.

To sum up, it is believed that schools already have the best curriculum of all traditional academic subjects that have great influences on students’ future life and teaching practical skill in schools seems waste their time. It is recommend, if we want student learn such life skills, they should better learn them in their free time.

TOEFL listening lectures: In October of which year did Vaudeville officially appear?

[Luschen]

Hi Minooee, I thought your essay was very good. I especially liked your example about pocket money. You addressed the topic well, but you do have some grammatical errors and phrases that don’t quite sound natural. Overall, I would rate this a band 6.5

@Minooee

Some practical skills such as money management should be taught in high school. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and real life examples.

[The] Curricul[a ] of schools ha[ve been] based on theoretical subject[s ] since the d[aw]n of time. Throughout the history, there has been [a ] {or “the”} strong idea that students had better{“had better” usually comes with a threat - “you had better do this or you’ll be in trouble” , so it sounds a bit off here} learn basics science. It is disagreed that some practical skills such as money management should be taught in high school since academic subjects are very important and life skill[s ] could be taught out[side] of school.

Nowadays, we live in a knowledge-based economy where independent thinking and problem solving are the most important skills. These skills are [the] output[s ] of academic subjects such as math, physics, and art {art is not really an academic subject, at least here in the US} and so on. It seems that devot[ing] all schools['s] timetable[s ] on these subject[s ] ha[s ] immensely positive effects on [the] future li[ves] of students. {“it seems” is not the most convincing statement} According to an article which was published in Jam newspaper, people who are the best problem solver[s ] have great math background information {“math background information” sounds a bit odd and vague - maybe “have a strong background in mathematics principles”} because they could easily find a specific pattern [in problems] based on mathematical theory for problems. {this doesn’t seem like the most convincing argument - why is seeing patterns important or what practical benefits does it have?} Thus, [the value of] allocating all time to teach[ing] such as important subject[s ] to student[s ] is difficult to debunk.

To addition to this, although life skills seem to be [as] important as academic subjects, they have less value and could be learnt anywhere. In fact, [ p]ractical skills such as money management should be taught by parents[,] not teachers[, ] and the best way to teach it is [through the use of] pocket money. For example, since I was in primary school, {your original sentence could be thought to mean “because I was in primary school”, though I don’t think this is what you mean} my father every week [has] g[iven] me a little money. I was entitled to spend all [my] money on one day[,] even on unnecessary stuff, however in this circumstance my father never charged[paid] me again until [the following] next week. So I had to manage my money. This example makes it clear that there are many ways to learn all sort[s ] of practical skills instead of learning them in schools. {great example!}

To sum up, it is believed that schools already have the best curriculum[, based on] of all [the] traditional academic subjects that have great influences on students’ future life and teaching practical skill[s ] in schools seems [to] waste their time. It is recommend[ed], if we want student[s to] learn such life skills, they [are better off learning] should better learn them in their free time.

TOEFL listening lectures: In October of which year did Vaudeville officially appear?