Please review my essay (TASK 2 IELTS WRITING). Thank you!

In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large, extended family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend?

An increasing number of people now prefer to live in a small family setting or as a one-person household, rather than as part of an extended family. In my opinion, I believe that this trend does not take the advantages of the individual.

On the one hand, this trend cannot be seen as positive for individuals or for each family members in small family units. On an individual level, people could certainly experience feelings of loneliness, isolation, and worry, as they can miss out on the emotional support and daily conversation with family members. Moreover, the trend towards living alone can significantly raise the demand for housing, which can cause the problems of accommodation planning for the local government. From an economic perspective, children in small families do not take the support and education of their grandparents if their parents do not have enough time to nurture and instruct them. As a result, there have been many juvenile delinquencies that the reason of these crimes is usually without taking care of from their parents and relatives.

On the other hand, people can be considered from the opposite angle if they live in extended family groups. From the financial point of view, they do not have to bear the weight of all household bills and responsibilities alone. This means it is not faced with rising living costs as little as possible. Many generations living in a house would help each individual experience many interesting things. For example, a lot of traditional culture values could be passed on by the elders, such as the recipes and ingredients of making a traditional food or the procedures of traditional customs.

In conclusion, I argue that there have been many more detrimental effects on individuals or children if a young adult lives alone or if people live with a few family members.

(308 words)