Dear Beees,
Could you rewrite the following pompous passage for me please. I just like to learn how you would rephrase it.
kind regards.
Arrears at present subsist on your mortgage account in the sum of $1,032, with a further payment becoming due on the 11the April. In view of the account being a mortgage account, we are not in a position to stop interest being debited each month and in order to prevent the account situation from deteriorating, it is necessary that payment are received each month which represent the interest debit. At present this amount is $242 and therefore it is regretted your offer to make payment in the sum of $80 a month is not sufficient.
For those who think they can beat Beees are most welcome as well.
What about me? I can’t even understand what it says. LOL. I, poor thing.
As a business letter, I wouldn’t actually change a lot of that. Just the following:
‘payment is…’ or ‘payments are…’
and
‘therefore we regret to inform you that your offer of’.
If you are asking for a rewrite in terms of being able to understand it, then I would say this:
Your mortgage is currently in arrears by an amount of $1,032 and your next payment is due on 11th April. With this type of account, we cannot reduce or stop the interest being added to the balance, so it is important to pay the amount due each month. If you do not do so, the interest due will spiral out of control. You will end up owing more each month than you pay off over the same period. For this period the interest which will be added to your account is $242. You need to pay off more $242 this month (and in future months) so that you do not owe more next month than you do this month. $80 will not be enough to cover this.
In other words:
If the borrower were to pay $242 each month then (assuming interest rates remained stable) the balance would remain the same and in arrears for ever (a situation which the company would not find acceptable. Obviously as interest rates fluctuate, the borrower might even find himself in deeper debt). The borrower needs to pay considerably more than $242 a month to begin to see a reduction in what is owed (first the arrears, then the remaining balance).
Thank you very much Beees. Beautiful as usual.
Kind regards.
I was cunning enough to get you rewrite the text in your version. In fact, I quite understand the text from the start, and I have the original precise. It’s such a beautiful rephrasing technique as well.
Should I bring out the original version for the other experts and learners alike to show how beautiful is British English? If you don’t mind.
It could enlighten their narrow and limited knowledge of British English.
Many would still think the difference between British English and American English is just all about a few different words.
They may not know the unique writing styles and techniques of British English. What do you think? The original text is from a Oxford’s book by a Guru.
You should take back my mine field to " what do you want to talk about" for the Charlatans. Just to make them jumpy, and gag their big mouths. lol.
kind regards.
Splendid! Mr. kyaw.
We are tempted sometime about the boarder issues, but why do you make a drowsy
situation here yet?
As we need you!
I think you are suggesting I change the title, so I’ve done so… not to make anyone ‘jumpy’ or to ‘gag them’, but so that it more accurately reflects the topic content.
Dear Bees.
The Guru rephrases it like this. Could you make any comments on his rephrased text please.
The arrears on your mortgage account are $1,032, and a further payment is due on 11 April. Regrettably we cannot stop interest being charged. Therefore, to prevent the arrears growing, you will need to pay the interest charge each month. At present this is $242, so we regret that your offer to pay $80 am month is not sufficient.
I wish other experts would rephrase the text.
kind regards.
Here is, one more touchstone for the big mouths who presume they were good at British English, to assess themselves.
I do expect your version as well.
( The organizers of the event should try to achieve greater safety both from the point of view of ensuring that the bonfire itself does not contain any unacceptably dangerous material such as aerosol cans or discarded foam furniture and from the point of view of ensuring the letting-off of fireworks in the designated area, with easily identifiable wardens to be available during the event to prevent people indiscriminately letting off fireworks, to the possible danger of people attending the event. )
kind regards.
Where are the charlatan professors and big mouths now?
Can’t even rewrite a phrase?
kind regards.
True learners love true British English. Not wishy washy English by so called professors with so called MA or PHD. We love to learn languages buy we won’t buy languages. We don’t need a MA to be the competent readers and learners.
kind regards.
My Guru rewrites like this:
(The organizers of the event should try to achieve greater safety by ensuring the bonfire does not contain any unacceptably dangerous materials such as aerosol cans or discarded foam furniture, and that fireworks are let off in the designated area. Easily identifiable wardens should be present to prevent people letting off fireworks indiscriminately.)
Do you have any comments, or can you write better than this?
This is my version of British English. You can rewrite it in any English that you’ve learned since 1900.
Ha - ha - ha.
kind regards.
N.B - Never ever try to look down on the well read native learners or foreign learners who pay your bills.
Dear Bees.
Let me have a chance to see your version. Honestly this time.
kind regards.
Savvy?
Why don’t you try a child play, Mr. MA and Mr. PHD?
( In the event of your being evicted from your dwelling as a result of willfully failing to pay your rent, the council may take the view that you have rendered yourself intentionally homeless and as such it would not be obliged to offer you alternative permanent housing. )
Any bird can be as beautiful as a Minah/Sterling.
kind regards.
My Guru gave me this child’s play paragraph as I’m an IQ40ed. He rewrites it like
( If you are evicted from your home because you deliberately fail to pay your rent, the council may decide that you have made yourself intentionally homeless. If this happens, the council does not need to offer you alternative permanent housing. )
Mr. Charlatan s! What’s your Professor Way of rephrasing it, teach me. If you are a genuine Professor. Unless, never insult the other learners again, especially the Asians.
This time that’s enough I just sliced your tongue.
If you dare come with your Real photo and Real name, Don’t be a Girl.
kind regards.
I believe the Charlatans have learned something now , at least they must know their real standards of English. And I should surrender my counter offensive back to ETN. Thank you.