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[Angiee]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing games teaches us about life. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

I agree with the statement that playing games teaches us about life. There are two types of games. Some people like to play games as individual, and other like to play games within team. There are many advantages to play games as an individual and with team members. One can learn independence and responsibility of one’s own action, one cannot lose anything from others mistakes, and one can set their own goals. Moreover, to play with team members, person can make more friends, can learn from other’s mistakes, person can inspired and motivated to do better in team, and person can learn quality like leadership, co-operation which helps in life. Therefore, playing games teaches us many things about life.

To playing game as an individual, one can learn independence and responsibility and one cannot lose game from others mistakes. As playing alone, persons cannot get chance to blame their fault to others. They know their responsibility towards their game and complete it on time. They become punctual and increase their speed. Furthermore, persons can set their own goals and have an enough time to complete it. For example, I usually play candy crush saga which have small amount of moves to complete levels; however, I learnt to set my own goals, and I understand my responsibility toward life from this game.

By playing with team members, there are many opportunities to learn from other’s mistakes and make new friends. Moreover, playing with team members each of them motivated and inspired each other to stay in game. It is very important to our life to be motivated each and every steps of life. Also, games can teach leadership, co-operation which is helpful in life. For example, if these things we already learnt from game, then it will be very useful when we are working in a company. These give professional skill to compete in the world.

In conclusion, a game teaches us many things. Individual games teach us to set own goal, to become independent in life, to become responsible and on time. Moreover, group games teach us leadership, co-operation. It members motivate and inspire each other in a group, and making new friends which is useful in future life.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from an American History class

[Luschen]

Hi Anglee, I thought your writing was pretty good, but I don’t think your structure was the best. You had one paragraph on the lessons to be learned from individual games and another for team games. Overall, I think you had 6 different lessons, which is too many to develop well in such a short essay. I think it would be better to focus on 3 so you can develop your paragraphs better. You don’t really have many examples in this essay, it is really just a list of ideas. Your writing is pretty clear, though you do have some incorrect prepositions and some errors in article use. Overall, I would rate this a 3.5 out of 5.

@Angiee

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing games teaches us about life. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

I agree with the statement that playing games teaches us about life. There are two types of games. Some people like to play games as individual[s ], and other like to play games within [a] team. There are many advantages to play [ playing] games as an individual and with team members. {this is unclear, like you play games as an individual and as part of a team at the same time} One can learn independence and responsibility of [for] one’s own action[s ], one cannot lose anything from others mistakes, {this is a little unclear to me} and one can set their own goals. {is this sentence supposed to be about the advantages of playing individual games? It is a little unclear} Moreover, to [by] play[ing] with team members, [a] person can make more friends, can learn from other’s mistakes, [a] person can inspired and motivated to do better in [ the ] team, and person can learn qualit[ies] like leadership [and] co-operation which helps in life. Therefore, playing games teaches us many things about life. {I think this is too many reasons. In a short essay like this, you can really only cover about three}

To[By] playing game[s ] as an individual, one can learn independence and responsibility and one cannot lose [the] game from others mistakes. As [they are] playing alone, persons cannot get [a] chance to blame their fault to[on] others. They know their responsibility towards their game and complete it on time. {this sounds a little odd = to complete your responsibility} They become punctual and increase their speed. Furthermore, persons can set their own goals and have an enough time to complete it.[them] For example, I usually play candy crush saga which have [requires a] small amount[number] of moves to complete levels; however, I learnt to set my own goals, and I understand my responsibility toward life from this game.{“responsibility toward life” sounds odd}

{Add a transition - maybe “On the other hand”} By playing with team members, there are many opportunities to learn from other’s mistakes and make new friends. Moreover, [when] playing with team members each of them motivat[es]and inspire[s ] each other to stay in [the] game. {“to stay in the game” sounds like an odd goal} It is very important to our life to be motivated each and every steps of life. Also, games can teach leadership [and] co-operation[,] which is[are] helpful in life. For example, if these things we already learnt [these lessons] from [a] game, then it will be very useful when we are working in a company. These give professional skill[s ] to [allow us to] compete in the world.

In conclusion, a game teaches us many things. Individual games teach us to set [our] own goal[s ], to become independent in life, [and] to become responsible and on time. Moreover, group games teach us leadership [and] co-operation. It members {“Its members” sounds odd here} motivate and inspire each other in a group, and [help us] mak[e ] new friends [,] which is useful in [our] future life.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from an American History class