My first simulation of the test

English as a Second Language Preparation for and help with the TOEFL® Test and
1

Ok, this morning I have completed my first simulation of the test.
Could you please review the independent writing?
I used the allotted time and of course this was the final section.
I have not corrected anything after the time expired.
I feel I have done an average essay here and a poor one on the integrated writing.
However, here it is:

You are planning to study abroad. Describe what you will like and dislike from this experience.

Studying abroad should be a thing that every student dreams for. It does not necessarily mean that you have to live abroad forever: you can just study abroad for a short period like three or six months. Unfortunately, some studentes do not like going away from where they were born, and some others do not have the economical possibility to do this experience. Personally, I really like the idea of studying abroad and I am very lucky to have a family that can fund me.

To begin with, studying abroad can help as an experience that build my personality. In my country, people in their 20s usually live with their family for both a cultural custom and the expensive cost of life. Studying in a foreign country will force me to live by myself. This implies to learn how to cook, how to clean the house, how to plan the visits at the supermarket and so on. Moreover, I will have to interact with people that I do not know. This will definitely help me, since I am a very shy person who talks only to friends and family whenever possible. Even if this could be an experience that I would dislike during the first period, I think I would overcome it after some weeks.

In addition to the formation of a stronger personality, you can learn a new language. To be honest the language can represent a problem at first: since I live in Italy, my language is spoken only in my country. So, studying abroad means learning a new language and since I can only speak in English, I think I will have some difficulties. However, I am sure I can improve my language skills studying hard during the first months of my staying. Then I will have a basic basis to speak in that language, and if I will have some extemporaneous difficulties, I can alway say what I want to say in English.

Finally, in combination with the building of my own personality and the learning of a new language, I will be able to compare how my national educational system compare with a foreign one. I think I live in a country where universities require a lot from students. Studying abroad will help me to confirm or reject this idea. For now, I think I will not find many difficulties for the different university system and organization. In my experience, quite all students who are gone to live abroad after finishing the university in Italy have been pursuing important careers, so the different university is not a point that scares me right now.

In considering what I will like and dislike about the experience of studying abroad, I have explored issues like the importance for my own personality; the chance to learn a new language; and the possibility to compare two different educational systems. For all of these reasons I think that this kind of experience will lead me many benefits with only marginal and minor cons, who I strongly believe I could overcome after a brief time.

TOEFL listening lectures: What aspect of Ben Franklin’s life does the speaker mainly discuss?

2

Hi, I think this is an outstanding essay. I just could not understand what you were trying to say in those last two sentences of the fourth paragraph.

3

As usual, thank you so much for your suggestions. Still I have been making many grammatical mistakes and I’m a bit scared. I will study your corrections.

4

I think it was really good - most of my corrections were not outright errors, just room for improvement. I would like to know though what you were trying to convey with those two sentences I could not understand.

5

I meant that since my national university is quite hard, in this moment I am sure that the foreign one will require less work and only little adjustments.
Since it was my last point, it is the weakest part and I didn’t know the best way to develop it.

6

For now, I think I will not find a different university system and organization overly difficult. In my experience, almost all students who have lived abroad to finish university have gone on to pursue important careers in Italy. So attending a university in a different country is not a concern that scares me right now.

Is this close to what you mean?

7

Exactly!