Museums and historical places cannot attract local people

[P.quanghuy21]

Hi Mr.Luschen
Can you help me correct my essay? Thank you very much

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people.
Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit those places.

Many countries are witnessing the fact that museums and historical places are able to attract only tourists, not local people. Several reasons have been set to explain this practice, and some methods can be adopted to mitigate the situation.

To begin with, this trend can be explained by the following reasons. Firstly, tourists are thrilled at discovering the culture and history of the place they are paying visit to, so museums and historical sites should be the suitable destinations. These places are able to provide valuable materials such as videos, artifacts which help visitors get a good grasp of the development of the civilization. On the other hand, museums seem too boring for young people, and they tend to prefer other types of entertainment. In addition, old people are likely to get too familiar with what are exhibited in those places.

From my perspectives, these methods can be put into practice to attract more local people. Schools can arrange annual visit to historical sites for their students and propagate the importance of young generation to those places. Children should be educated to fully understand the local history and their responsibilities to protect those sites. Museum managers could also provide free tickets or souvenirs to local people. Moreover, utilizing technology to present the items in the museums so that they are exhibited in a more fancy fashion might be the most effective method.

In conclusion, it seems to that museums and historical places cannot attract local people because they are too boring for the young or become familiar with old people. Therefore, several methods can be taken into consideration to mitigate the situation.

[Luschen]

Hi, I think you started out addressing the prompt fine, but then you talked about young and old people, which seemed to be off the topic. This prompt is a bit tough because it seems to be assuming that the status quo of visitors to museums being from out of town is a bad thing. As you state, it is only natural to want to visit a museum when you visit an unfamiliar area. Maybe you could state that you don’t think this is all bad, but if a museum wants to also serve their local citizens, there are some steps the management could take. Your writing in this one seemed very clear, but your thesis and topic sentences seemed a little boring and uncreative to me.

@P.quanghuy21

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people.
Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit those places.

Many countries are witnessing the fact that museums and historical places are able to attract only [out of town visitors ],{try to paraphrase the prompt} not local people. Several reasons have been set to explain this practice, and some methods can be adopted to mitigate the situation.

To begin with, this trend can be explained by the following reasons. Firstly, tourists are thrilled at discovering the culture and history of the place they are paying [a ]visit to, so museums and historical sites should be {I think “are rightly the suitable” is better here} the suitable destinations. These places are able to provide valuable materials such as videos [and] artifacts which help visitors get a good grasp of the development of the civilization. On the other hand, museums seem too boring for young people, and they tend to prefer other types of entertainment. In addition, old people are likely to get too familiar with what are exhibited {maybe “with what exhibits are displayed in …”} in those places. {why are you talking about old people vs young people? The prompt is only about locals vs tourists. I am sure locals and tourists each include both young and old}

From my perspectives, [several] methods can be put into practice to attract more local people. Schools can arrange annual [visits] to historical sites for their students and propagate the importance[ of those places to the] young generation. Children should be educated to fully understand the local history and their responsibilities to protect those sites. Museum managers could also provide free tickets or souvenirs to local people. Moreover, utilizing technology to present the items in the museums so that they are exhibited in a [fancier] {though probably better to say “in a more captivating fashion” or something similar} fashion might be the most effective method.

In conclusion, it seems to [be the case] that museums and historical places cannot attract local people because they are too boring for the young or become [too] familiar with old people. Therefore, several methods can be taken into consideration to mitigate the situation.

[P.quanghuy21]

Young and old people here I mean young and old local citizens. I think I should make it clearer on this point. Thank you so much