Please check for my essay please. Here is the checklist:
Answer to topic question ?
Accuracies?
Direct and well-organized?
Logically connected?
Details and examples support the main idea?
Express complete thoughts?
Easy to comprehend?
Wide range of vocabulary?
All comments are welcomed. Thank you in advance
Essay topic 7: How do movies and television influence people’s behaviour? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.
Movies and televisions are becoming more and more popular among people so that they influence our behaviours a lot. They not only supports our attitude towards life like connecting people, improving learning, providing news and entertainments but they also have some bad efforts on us: violent and sexual contents.
Television is one of the best way to connect people. Family members can spend time together watching the same favourite TV programmes. We can also know more about other cultures which are interesting and make people all over the world closer and closer. Learning also receives benefits from movies and televisions. Since they reflect the real life, they can teach kids values and life lessons like how to behave in a class, how to be polite in public… There are many documentaries that encourage critical thinking about society; sometimes, people raise some topics to discuss from them, for instance, the inflation in recent years. Finally, movies and television are means of newscasting and entertaining. Movies and music are available every time in various channels and there are also some specialized channels provide the most updated news to us.
Despite all of these advantages, televisions and movies also has disadvantages. Because violent films shown on TV are hard to control, many children suffer from these. Some are fear of them; therefore, they tend to be afraid of the real life. Some try to imitate because they think it is interesting and consequently, that increases their aggressive behaviour at home and at school. Sexual contents are also unavoidable. Many people find it normal to see these programmes; however, teenagers may be mislet from these about safe sex and have wrong behaviour and activities about sex, which can do harm a lot to their life in the future. It’s obvious that all of these effect can make people, especially young people, more apathetic in their work and studies.
In conclusion, I think that movies and televisions have both advantages and disadvantages. However, if we can control the way we use them by ourselves, we can increase its benefits and decrease its bad effects.
Essay topic 7: How do movies and television influence people’s behaviour? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.
Movies and televisions are becoming more and more popular among people so that they influence our behaviours a lot. They not only supports our attitude towards life like connecting people, improving learning, providing news and entertainments but they also have some bad efforts on us: violent and sexual contents.
Television is one of the best way to connect people. Family members can spend time together watching the same favourite TV programmes. We can also know more about other cultures which are interesting and make people all over the world closer and closer. Learning also receives benefits from movies and televisions. Since they reflect the real life, they can teach kids values and life lessons like how to behave in a class, how to be polite in public… There are many documentaries ENCOURAGING critical thinking about society; Sometimes, people raise some topics to discuss ABOUT, for instance, the inflation in recent years. Finally, movies and television are means of newscasting and entertaining. Movies and music are available every time in various channels and there are also some specialized channels provide the most updated news to us.
Despite all of these advantages, televisions and movies also HAVE disadvantages. Because violent films shown on TV are hard to control, many children suffer from these. Some are fearED of them; therefore, they tend to be afraid of the real life. Some try to imitate because they think it is interesting TO ,consequently, increases their aggressive behaviour EITHER at home OR school. Sexual contents are also unavoidable/ INEVITABLE. Many people find it normal to see these programmes; however, teenagers may be mislet from safe sex and have wrong behaviour and activities about sex, which can do harm a lot to their life in the future. It’s obvious that all of these effect can make people, especially YOUTH, more apathetic in their work and studies.
In conclusion, I think that movies and televisions have both advantages and disadvantages. However, if we can control the way we use them by ourselves, we can increase its benefits and decrease its bad effects.
Such matured thoughts my friend, I found it very thrilling to read about. Good grammar and outline structure. However, I am not as experted as to give you the comprehensive correction. Just my attemption to contemplate your essay.
Thanks
Tri Truong
Thank you Bxnl for your checking. I just wonder what is the difference between these sentences?
“There are many documentaries ENCOURAGING critical thinking about society”
“There are many documentaries that encourage critical thinking about society”
Both of them are true or just the first one?