Is my homework acceptable? (The bonus of Whiteness)

English as a Second Language English Vocabulary, Grammar and Idioms
1

Hi,
i had to write a newspaper article about “Advantage of Witeness”.

Could you help me, if there are some grammar failures or if there are some sentences which don’t sound good and you may know better ones? Thanks so much :slight_smile:

The bonus of Whiteness

Most of them are part of the upper-class, earn most of the money in our society and are preferred in every single way. Even it’s not as difficult for them to get a job as for black people. You know who I mean – the White ones (is there a special,ironic word for white people???)!
Do you think that your skin-color does not matter if you have money?
That this is defiantly not true was showed in a manufactory for stretch-limousines in Georgia. This company called “Stretch it!” (you may know a better name?^^) is one of the biggest and popular manufactories all over America. It’s also well known for it’s good quality and friendlieness towards pontential buyers.
But when recently, a black businessman from New-York ordered a white limouse to use it for merchandising events of his company, this image was defend.

The incredible thing is, that the owner of the limousine-factory didnn’t want the black guy to get a white limousine.
He said that black people only get black limousines.

So… what will be the next? Only black toilet-paper for the blacks?
I think the time has come to overthink the tolerance of our society!

2

maybe you also know some sentences i can add ? :slight_smile:

3

Are you supposed to write a newspaper article? Newspaper articles are objective. Yours is very subjective. Were you supposed to write an editorial? That allows you to voice your opinions.

While more members of the upper-classes are white (without doubt) than black, it is NOT true that most whites are upper-class.

Manufactory - use the word “factory.”

How could we come up with a better name for a company if it is an actual company? (Or did you make it up because the entire project can be fictional?)

In the US, if a business owner said that only black limousines were available for black people, he’s be sued so fast his head would spin. If you’ve made this up, please use better examples. There are interesting, and sad, examples, of people who make appointments to view apartments - when the black person shows up, he is told the apartment has already been rented, but when his colleague in the experiment shows up half an hour later, the apartment is still available.

4

The factory does not exist… :wink: its fictional :slight_smile: