Integrated essay: Quakers detected by the Russian submarine

[Kattie]

The passage and the lecture present the various theories about the strange sounds i.e. Quakers detected near the patrolling area of the Russian submarine. The passage states various theories that might have caused the Quakers. The lectures disputes each theories by providing several reasons.

First, the passage states the sound is made by the Octa whale to attract the male partner. The lecture says that it is believable that Quakers are similar to sound made by the Octa whale. However, the Octa whale are generally found near the surface water, whereas Russian submarine are patrolling in deeper parts of the sea. Therefore, the sound produced by the whale cannot be detected by sonar in deeper parts. Thus’ this argument contradicts the theory showed in the passage.

Second, the passage shows that Quaker is made by Giant squid. As they have soft body with no skeleton’ their movement cannot be detected by the sonar. The lecture accepts the fact of the presence of Giant squid in deeper sea. On the other hand , it explains that the sound was first heard in 1960 which was disappeared in 1980. If the sound was made by Giant squid than it would not have stopped suddenly after some decades as giant squid are present in current situation.

Finally, the passage states that another military submarine might be doing silent patrolling in that area. The lecture contradicts this point by claiming that if other submarine were doing secret patrolling the they would not have change quickly. The engine noise were as similar as the Russian submarine’s. Even today’s submarines are not that fast and silent. So it would not have been other secret submarine.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from a social sciences class (2)

[Luschen]

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[Luschen]

Here is a link to the lecture and reading: english-test.net/forum/sutra … tml#570071

Hi Kattie, i think your essay has an effective format and you managed to capture most of the content from the lecture, although you did get that one secondary point in the third example wrong. I think you could have been even stronger in stating that the lecture contradicts the reading. Some good words to use here include refutes, contends, disagrees, rejects, and opposes. Your writing is pretty clear, but you do have some mistakes in grammar and usage. I think maybe this one might sneak by with a 4 out of 5, but would probably score a bit lower.

@Kattie

The passage and the lecture present{“discuss” is better - really the reading presents them while the lecture dismisses them} the various theories about the strange sounds i.e. Quakers {it is “quackers”, “Quakers” are members of a particular religious group, so this sounds very funny! }detected near the patrolling area of the Russian submarine[s ]. The passage states various theories that might have caused the Quakers[, while t]he {it was ok, but this flows better} lectures disputes each theor[y ] by providing several reasons.

First, the passage states the sound is [may have] made by the O[rca] whale to attract the male partner. {actually it says both sexes make the sound to attract each other} The lecture says that it is believable that Quakers are similar to sound[s ] made by the Octa whale. However, {use a stronger contrast word than “however” to show that the lecture disagrees with the reading} the Octa whale[s ] are generally found near the surface water, whereas Russian submarine [we]re patrolling in deeper parts of the sea. Therefore, the sound produced by the whale cannot be[could not have been] detected by sonar in deeper parts. Thus[,] this argument contradicts the theory show[n ]{“given” is better when talking about writing} in the passage.

Second, the passage s[tates] that Quaker is[could be] made by Giant squid. As they have soft bod[ies] with no skeleton’ their movement cannot be detected by the sonar. The lecture accepts the fact of the presence of Giant squid in deeper sea. On the other hand , it explains that the sound was first heard in 1960[, ] which was [then] disappeared in 1980. {actually, it talks about the '60s and the '80s , but that is a minor point} If the sound was made by Giant squid than it would not have stopped suddenly after some decades[,] as giant squid are present in current situation.{“are present in the current situation” sounds odd in this context}

Finally, the passage states that another military submarine might be doing silent patrolling in that area. The lecture contradicts this point by claiming that if other submarine[s ] were doing secret patrolling{“secret patrols” is better - sometimes a verb is also a noun, like “patrol”, “march”, and “dream” and in that case we generally don’t use the gerund as the object of a verb} the they would not have change[d direction so] quickly. The engine noise were as similar as the Russian submarine’s. {this sentence is incorrect - it says the quackers had no engine noise at all} Even today’s submarines are not that fast and silent. So it [ c]ould not have been [an]other secret submarine.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from a social sciences class (2)