One (instead of “as one”) of the most successful African American businesses in history, the Motown Record Corporation was founded in 1959 in Detroit by Berry Gordy, Jr.
First of all, I understand that the opening phrase renames the noun “Motown Record Corporation” and should be grammtically parallel to the noun it renames. And if changing “one” to “as one”, the phrase would become a prepositional phrase that cannot serve as a noun. This is basically the explaination given by my study guide, but I am just wondering, how can this sentence be changed so the opening phrase could be “as one of the…”
. As one of the most successful African American businesses in history, the Motown Record Corporation proudly represents the best of the black community….
Do you think that [color=blue]" One of …business in history" and [color=blue]" The Motown Record Corparation …by Berry Gordy,Jr" share the common sentence independency ? I would think they are two sentences . If you add [color=blue]"as " they will be one sentence from [color=blue]“One " to [color=blue]” Berry Gordy ,Jr" . So I think the difference is their sentence structure.
I think in MM’s sentence it can be written with passive ,too. mmm, the difference isn’t about tenses.
[color=blue]As one of the African American businesses in history the Motown Record Corporation [color=blue]was founded in 1959 in Detroit by Berry Gordy, Jr.
Now, I wonder if there were many other African American businesses builit at the same time . It is another question relating to the sentence 's right meaning ( no misunderstandings) rather than grammar.
Hi, MM
I have a question . It is about how to build the sentence’s structure well , thus there wouldn’t be any misunderstanding.
For example, you said it didn’t work when I typed [color=blue]" As one of the most successful African American businesses in history the Motown Record Corporation was founded in 1959 in Detroit by Berry Gordy, Jr. " . Because I think you might read it as [color=blue]" The Motown Record Corporation was founded in 1959 in Detroit by Berry Gordy, Jr as one of the most successful African American businesses in history." , What I want to say, is that on the basis of a true history you are right, it couldn’t be successful just at the beginning of its foundation. The problem is , that my typing has no mistakes in grammar but it is wrong in meaning. So I wonder if I want to keep the same meaning , meanwhile, I want to keep using the prep “as” , how to rewrite it ? By the way, I don’t know whether it is a problem about Chinese and English. When I read from the first[color=blue] "As one " to the last “[color=blue] Berry Gorday,Jr” I think it is right to a Chinese mind, there is no misunderstand. Only when I put [color=blue]“as one” behind “[color=blue] Berry Gorday ,Jr” Both Chinese and English would feel it wrong in meanings. I mean I can understand the prep part first then come to the main clause , it is ok for a Chinese mind. But you said it didn’t work , I hope you understand my question. Really, now I feel confused ,too. Sorry for disturbing your nerves. :oops:
Hi FangFang
Though your question was addressed to MM, here’s my opinion:
You’re right, FangFang. The sentence isn’t logical this way either.
It seems to me that in order to use “as” in the sentence, you’d have to change the content of sentence significantly – as MM has already done. In other words, it wouldn’t be simply a matter of rearranging words or changing a verb tense. When “As one” begins this sentence, the error is simply somewhat less obvious.
How about “One of the most successful African American businesses in history, the Motown Record Corporation[color=blue], was founded in 1959 in Detroit by Berry Gordy, Jr.”
Personally, I’d probably also use a comma there (where you inserted one). Doing so wouldn’t change the meaning, but the missing comma may well be a source of confusion here.