Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

[nancy2710]

It is sometimes argued that tourists from foreign countries should pay more than local residents to visit important sites and monuments. While I believe there are several reasons why this might be true, I would argue that foreign and local visitors should be charged equally.

To begin with, there are some reasons why visitors from overseas should pay more. First, cultural and historical attractions often depend on state subsidies to keep them going, which means that the local population already pays money to these sites through the tax system. As a result, the locals should be given priority over foreign travellers by charging them less. Second, some people might say that because foreign tourists are the main reason for the building of these attractions, they should pay higher admission fees to these sites.

However, I would argue that there should be no discrimination between the fees that foreign tourists and local people have to pay to visit cultural and historical sites. First of all, foreign tourists contribute to the economy of the host country by spending their money on a wide range of goods and services such as food, souvenirs, accommodation and travel. Additionally, if travellers realised that they would have to pay more to visit historical and cultural attractions in a particular nation, they would perhaps decide not to go to that country on holidays. Consequently, the number of tourists would remarkably reduce and a country could risk losing money for the maintenance of these important buildings.

In conclusion, while I understand why many people might think overseas tourists should be charged more than local residents, I believe it is better to treat them equally and every effort should be made to attract tourists all over the world.

[Luschen]

Hi Nancy, welcome to the forum! I think your writing is outstanding and your ideas are clearly presented. One key point though is that the prompt asks “to what extent”, so make sure to clearly state the extent to which you hold your believe. Something like “strongly agree”, “somewhat agree”, “partially agree”. Secondly, I think that your first paragraph could be modified a bit to better fit your thesis statement. Your main idea is that foreign and local visitors should be charged equally, yet half of your body paragraphs support the opposite viewpoint. It is better to clearly state that although some people hold the view that foreigners should be charged more, they are wrong and then give the reasons why these supporters of the other side are mistaken. You sort of do this in your conclusion when you say “I understand why many people might think …” but it is better to state this consistently through your essay so that you meet the requirement to “present a clear position throughout the response.” The responses to a “to what extent do you agree or disagree” type prompt require a different format than one to a “discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion” type prompt. Still, like I said earlier, your writing itself sounds very natural and only has a few errors, which did not interfere with my comprehension. Here are some specific suggestions:

@nancy2710

It is sometimes argued that tourists from foreign countries should pay more than local residents to visit important sites and monuments. While I believe there are several reasons why this might be true, I would argue that foreign and local visitors should be charged equally.

To begin with, there are [valid] reasons why visitors from overseas should pay more. First, cultural and historical attractions often depend on state subsidies to keep them going, which means that the local population already pays money to these sites through the tax system. {wow, this is a good argument!} As a result, the locals should be given priority over foreign travellers by charging them less. Second, some people might say that because foreign tourists are the main reason for the building {ok, but “construction” might be better here} of these attractions, they should pay higher admission fees to these sites. {this reason is not as strong - what evidence is there that these attractions have been built for foreigners? I think it needs a little more explanation}

However, I would argue that there should be no discrimination between [in terms of] the fees {it sounded a little like the fees were being discriminated against, not the two groups of people} that foreign tourists and local people have to pay to visit cultural and historical sites. First of all, foreign tourists contribute to the economy of the host country by spending their money on a wide range of goods and services such as food, souvenirs, accommodation and travel. Additionally, {this is not really an additional reason, it is an explanation for the previous reason - tourists boost the economy, but if they have to pay extra for attractions, they may no longer visit and the economic boost would disappear} if travellers realised that they would have to pay more to visit historical and cultural attractions in a particular nation, they would perhaps decide not to go to that country on holidays. Consequently, the number of tourists would remarkably {“remarkably” sounds odd here - usually remarkable means unusual or outstanding - “unusually reduce” or “an outstanding reduction” would be odd} reduce and a country could risk losing money for the maintenance of these important buildings.

In conclusion, while I understand why many people might think overseas tourists should be charged more than local residents, I believe it is better to treat them equally {why do you believe this? Restate your main reasons in the conclusion} and every effort should be made to attract tourists [from] all over the world.