Essay on traveling

Hi, please evaluate my essay and see if you can spot any problems, any feedback would be much appreciated.


Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries.

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.


I believe its more beneficial to travel internationally but this should not undermine the importance of domestic travel, i believe one should first travel through his home country, then travel through the rest of the world. traveling in the home country is easier because there is no language and cultural barrier and domestic travels are way cheaper than international ones. but domestic destinations are very limited, there are natural landscapes like deserts, mountain ranges, rain forests and etc… that simply are not in the home country, and if the person wants to see that he should go to another country.

some international destination have unique natural environments and historical sites, for examle there is only one niagra falls in the world and the great wall of china is one of a kind. one would gain perspective and be awed by just being in that places, for example just by watching the great pyramids of Egypt one would be in awe and wonder of this magnificent and beautiful structures. scientist still dont know how the pyramids were created, it is still a unsolved historical problem. one could imagine what life would be in that historical periods, how life and culture and people were different to this age. so i think it would provide perspective and be good for growth of a person.

international traveling would be more rewarding as the person learns the customs and culture of the destination but it is also harder because of cultural differences. when somebody goes to another country, he or she should try too see the world as their point of view and follow their rules in regards of food, clothing and etc., for example in some islamic states woman are required to have hijab–clothings that hide the skin and hair of a woman-- and consumption of alcoholic beverages are forbidden.

i believe going to another country and getting to know the local people and their culture would give the traveler more perspective on life, people and culture. it would be a really great experience for the traveler. with more international travels, people would understand each other better and that would be really great for humanity itself. if we could reach understanding of each other, there would be less war because we would see each other as human beings just born in different cultures and environments, we would see others as brothers not enemies.

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(You are welcome, Irhm! Your essay is good. But please mind your capitalizations, repetitions and punctuations. You may remove the highlighted words and phrases and the brackets, and see how your essay then reads. All the best!)

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Torsten, I wonder how the smileys have happened to be inserted. I didn’t add any. What do they signify?

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If you use certain combinations of colons, semi-colons and brackets the system thinks you want to create emojis and converts your combination of characters into emojis.

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I see. Thank you, Torsten.
The author does not seem to have returned to the essay yet.

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Thank you anglophile. I’ve heard toefl examiners are easy on these trivial errors. Nonetheless i should work on my punctuations and be more careful with capitalizations and apostrophes.

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Please also make sure that you spell the personal “I” correctly.

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