TOEFL Integrated Essay Evaluation


Jane Austen (1775-1817) is one of the most famous of all English novelists, and today her novels are more popular than ever, with several recently adapted as Hollywood movies. But we do not have many records of what she looked like. For a long time, the only accepted image of Austen was an amateur sketch of an adult Austen made by her sister Cassandra. However recently a professionally painted, full-length portrait of a teenage girl owned by a member of the Austen family has come up for sale. Although the professional painting is not titled Jane Austen, there are good reasons to believe she is the subject.

First, in 1882, several decades after Austen’s death, Austen’s family gave permission to use the portrait as an illustration in an edition of her letters. Austen’s family clearly recognized it as a portrait of the author. So, for over a century now, the Austen family itself has endorsed the claim that the girl in the portrait is Jane Austen.

Second, the face in the portrait clearly resembles the one in Cassandra’s sketch, which we know depicts Austen. Though somewhat amateurish, the sketch communicates definite details about Austen’s face. Even though the Cassandra sketch is of an adult Jane Austen, the features are still similar to those of the teenage girl in the painting. The eyebrows, nose, mouth, and overall shape of the face are very much like those in the full-length portrait.

Third, although the painting is unsigned and undated, there is evidence that it was painted when Austen was a teenager. The style links it to Ozias Humphrey, a society portrait painter who was the kind of professional the wealthy Austen family would hire. Humphrey was active in the late 1780s and early 1790s, exactly the period when Jane Austen was the age of the girl in the painting.


Professor:
The evidence linking this portrait to Jane Austen is not at all convincing. Sure, the painting has long been somewhat loosely connected to Austen’s extended family and their descendents, but this hardly proves it’s a portrait of Jane Austen as a teenager. The reading’s arguments that the portrait is of Austen are questionable at best.

First, when the portrait was authorized for use in the 1882 publication of her letters, Jane Austen had been dead for almost 70 years. So the family members who asserted that the painting was Jane had never actually seen her themselves. They couldn’t have known for certain if the portrait was of Austen or not.

Second, the portrait could very well be that of a relative of Austen’s, a fact that would explain the resemblance between its subject and that of Cassandra’s sketch. The extended Austen family was very large and many of Jane Austen’s female cousins were teenagers in the relevant period or had children who were teenagers. And some of these teenage girls could have resembled Jane Austen. In fact, many experts believe that the true subject of the portrait was one of those relatives, Marianne Kempian, who was a distant niece of Austen’s. Third, the painting has been attributed to Humphrey only because of the style. But other evidence points to a later date. A stamp on the back of the picture indicates that the blank canvas, you know the actual piece of cloth on which the picture was painted, was sold by a man named William Legg. Record showed that William Legg did not sell canvases in London when Jane Austen was a teenager. He only started selling canvases when she was 27 years old. So it looks like the canvas was used for the painting at a time when Austen was clearly older than the girl in the portrait.

MY ESSAY:
The passage states that the full-length portrait of a teenage girl owned by austin family member is believed to be of Jane Austen when she was a teenager. The passage provides three reasons to support this claim. However, the professor questions the claim and refutes each of the point.

First, the passage states that Austen family gave permission to use the same portrait in an edition of her letters, so it means that family members recognized the portrait to be of Jane Austen. The lecture refutes this point and says that, when the family members authorized this portrait, it was 70 years since the death of Jane Austen and family member may have never seen Jane Austen. Hence, family members cannot be certain that the portrait is of the author.

Second, the passage posits that the face in the portrait resembles to one of the cassandra’s sketched and both the portrait and the sketch have similar features. However, the professor opposes this. The professor states that the extended family of Jane was very large and there is a possibility that the sketch drawn by Cassandra is of one of the cousins or niece of Jane Austen and not the author herself as the family members can have similar features.

Third, the passage says that even though the painting is unsigned and undated, there are evidences that it was drawn when Austen was a teenager as it links to the style of Ozais Humphrey who was likely hired by wealthy Austen family. The professor dismisses this point and says that the stamp which was at the back of canvas suggest that it was drawn by Artist called William in London. Professor furthers says that William didn’t sell paintings in London when Austen was a teenager but started selling paintings when Austen was atleast 27 years old and not a teenager.

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Please review the above essay at Rate this essay on 5 please. Thanks

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May I ask you what institution you are applying at? You might not need a TOEFL score.

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I would be applying to universities which would require TOEFL score. Thanks Could you rate this essay please

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I would give a TOEFL score of 14 - 17 keeping in mind that the entire TOEFL system is becoming less and less relevant.

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I didn’t get you, what do you mean by less relevant and 14-17 about out of how much.

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Are you familiar with the current TOEFL grading system?

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Yes it on 30 right? I dont know much about how they Grade.