TOEFL essay: Imagine you are preparin for a trip. You plan to be away from your

English as a Second Language Preparation for and help with the TOEFL® Test and
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Hello guys. I am new here, I am preparing for TOEFL-iBT. This is my first essay. Well, this is the topic: Imagine you are preparing for a trip. You plant to be away from your home for a year. In additional to clothing and personal care items, you can take one additional thing. What would you take and why? Use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.

Nowadays, we could not imagine our lives without personal computer isn’t it? If I must take one item of mine, when I’m going to a trip, definitely it would be my computer. In my opinion, this item has many advantages. As an example, with the help of my computer, I can improve my skills in many areas, also I can perfect my knowlage and last, but not least, I can use it for relaxation.

First of all, we live in constantly changeling world. The improvement of modern technologies is growing rapidly, therefore the computers nowadays have many options. I am interested in architecture, often I am creating many projects and I use “Autocad” this is computer software and I am not able to do my obligations without this computer program, while I am drawing my projects, definitely I improve my drawing skills. Also with the help of my computer I could read many books, so I would improve my reading skills too.

Second, easily I could turn my computer into a TV. Thus, I could watch many different TV programs. Like Discovery Channel and National Geographic as an example. I am devoted fan of “Ultimate Survival”. In this transmission the leading actor is faced with many troubles. He must survive in extreme situations and he shows many valuable skills to be alive. So, when I am watching my favourite TV program, certainly I learn significant information about live and I could survive everywhere.

And finally, I could use my computer for relaxation. When I am tired after long day at work, I prefer to use my computer for relaxation. Good instance is all computer games. When I am playing any game I forget for my obligations, I could find rest for myself. Also I can prevent the stress.

In conclusion, I could not imagine my life without personal computer, therefore if I go to a trip, the computer would be the item, which I would take with me.

It is my first try. Every piece of advice will be quite helpful for me.

TOEFL listening lectures: A university lecture by a professor of Social History (2)

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Alan, Can you check my essay? ;(

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:frowning: Why, I don’t have answer yet :frowning:

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Good morning. When you ask for Alan specifically, then you must await his reply.

If you simply want correction, then ask:- " Please, can someone check my essay."

Kitos.

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Ok thanks for the correction, so can someone chack my essay , i will be quite thankful :frowning:

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Nowadays, we could not imagine our lives without personal computer COULD WE?
If I must take one item of mine, when I’m going ON a trip, definitely it would be my computer, BECAUSE In my opinion, this item has many advantages.
As an example, with the help of my computer, I can improve my skills in many areas, also I can perfect my (knowledge) and last, but not least, I can use it for relaxation.

First of all, we live in A constantly CHANGING world. The improvement of modern technologies is growing rapidly, therefore the computers nowadays have many options.
I am interested in architecture, often I am creating many projects and I use “Autocad” :
THIS is computer software and I am not able to do my obligations without this computer program. While I am drawing my projects, definitely I improve my drawing skills. Also with the help of my computer I could read many books, so I would improve my reading skills too.

Second, I COULD EASILY turn my computer into a TV. Thus, I could watch many different TV programs. Like Discovery Channel and National Geographic as an example. I am A devoted fan of “Ultimate Survival”. In this transmission the leading actor is faced with many PROBLEMS. He must survive in extreme situations and he shows many valuable skills IN STAYING alive. So, when I am watching my favourite TV program, I AM ABLE TO learn significant information about LIFE and I could survive everywhere.

FINALLY, I could use my computer for relaxation,when I am tired after long day at work: I prefer to use my computer for relaxation. A GOOD EXAMPLE ARE all OF THE computer games. When I am playing any game I forgetL ALL ABOUT my MANY obligations, I could find rest for myself. Also I can prevent the stress.
In conclusion, I could not imagine my life without HAVING A personal computer, therefore if I go to a trip, the computer would be the item, which I would take with me.

Hello Mladenqnev, your essay is OK, although your sentence structure is a little wild.
Some sentences could be lengthened and improved by using a conjunction.
Keep writing and reading. You are getting there.

Kitos.

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Actually, I finished my TOEFL course before 2 week, since then, I feel like I am losing my english knowlage, because I don’t learn enough. Also the fact, that nonone doesn’t check my essay turns me into a confused person. Мoreover, I could not sleep last night. However, now I see that you Kitosdad checked my essay, many thanks about it, I am glad to use this forum, and definitely I want to develop my language skills, so I will try to show my best and i want to pass this exam. Cheers from Bulgaria, as soon as possible, I will post two new essays. Have a nice day.