Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city

[Alirrrrrr]

Hello, This is the first post which have had here. Please rate it based on the TOEFL exam. Tnx

Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which
place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Cities have been being a significant role in the history and incidents which have happened and we can read about those in the history books. But, a question which arises here for evaluating and comparing cities, is that which cities are more suitable for living? A big one or a small one. Personally, I am in a favor of those who are thinking that living in big cities are more profitable than living in small cities because of there exist more job positions, more entertainment and you live in the way you want to.

The first and most important reason is that finding any job in small cities which is fit for you and your expert is really harder than bigger cities because a city with population around some hundreds of thousands person will have both more job positions and job varieties. In contrast, a tiny city has no or a few factory as well as in these places majority of people has a job which is about agriculture directly or indirectly. So, you would not able to choose your job’s field exactly but also in the big cities you could.

Another reason why I choose this choice is that small towns could not able to satisfy big entertainment companies, hyper markets and etc. to install a new branch in their own towns. Because they might think that it could not be a fruitful investment because their customers in these kind of cities are not so much. Also, because of the nature of economy we easily can find out that governmental and non-governmental companies incline to invest in the big cities which will make an evolution for them. This is one of the most important reasons which made these city more progressive.

Last but not the least, if you live in a small town you could not do what you want as easily as you can do in another places because you are familiar for most of people who live there. So, you have to care of your treat not only in where you live but also in everywhere of the city. This is not interesting for me that everyone know you. Even though, it causes to everyone says hello. But I think that the mentioned weakness impelled me to live in a big city.

From what have been discussed above, I reiterate that the advantages of living in a big city largely outweigh the disadvantages as well as it has some distinct advantages over living in a town. So, living in hyper cities would made an interesting life style for us.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture in social science class

[Luschen]

Hi, welcome to the forum. I enjoyed reading your essay. I think you addressed teh topic well and had a good format for your essay. Your first body paragraph seemed pretty strong, but your writing quality seemed to deteriorate and your last body paragraph was very confusing to me. You have quite a lot of awkward sounding phrases and mistakes in usage. Overall, I would rate this a 3 out of 5.

@Alirrrrrr

Hello, This is the first post which have had here. Please rate it based on the TOEFL exam. Tnx

Some people prefer to live in a small town. Others prefer to live in a big city. Which
place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Cities have been being [played] a significant role in the history and incidents [have been the scene of many events] which have happened and we can read about those in the history books. But,{avoid beginning sentences with “and” or “but” - here you could use “Still,”} a question which arises here for[when] evaluating and comparing cities, is that which cities are more suitable for living? A big one or a small one[?] {here you switched from plural to singular, which sounds odd} Personally, I am in a favor of those who are thinking {this construction seems overly complicated - just say what you believe, not that you support others who have certain beliefs} that living in big cities [is] are more profitable than living in small cities because [they have] of there exist more job positions, more entertainment [venues] and you [can] live in the way you want to.

The first and most important reason is that finding any job in small cities which[that] is fit for you and your [field of] expert[ese] is really [much] harder than [in] bigger cities because a city with [a ]population around some hundreds of thousands person will have both more job positions and job varieties. In contrast, a tiny city has no or a few factory [just a few factories or none at all] as well as in these places [the] majority of people ha[ve] a job which[that] is about [related to] agriculture directly or indirectly. So [in a small town], you would not able to choose your job’s field exactly but also in the big cities you could.

Another reason why I choose[make] this choice {“choose choice” sounds a little odd} is that small towns could not [be] able to satisfy[convince] big entertainment companies, hyper markets and etc.{avoid abbreviations} to install{“build” or “establish” is better than “install”} a new branch in their own towns[, b]ecause they might think that it could not be a fruitful investment because [of a lack of] their customers in these kind of cities {I would not use “cities” - the prompt says towns, so use that or villages} are not so much. Also, because of the nature of [the] economy we easily can find out that governmental and non-governmental companies [are] incline[d ] to invest in the big cities[,] which will make an evolution for them. {this last phrase sounds odd and the whole sentence is a little awkward}This is one of the most important reasons which made [that makes] these cit[ies] more progressive.

Last but not the least, if you live in a small town you could not do what you want as easily as you can do in another places because you are familiar for [to] most of people who live there. So, you have to care of your treat {“care of your treat” does not make sense} not only in where you live but also in everywhere of the city. {this whole sentence is confusing} This is not interesting {“interesting” does not seem like the correct word here} for me that everyone know[s ] you. Even though, it causes to everyone says hello. But{don’t use both “though” and “but”} I think that the mentioned weakness impelled me to live in a big city. {this whole paragraph was pretty weak}

From what have been discussed above, I reiterate that the advantages of living in a big city largely outweigh the disadvantages as well as it has some distinct advantages over living in a town. {this sentence sounds awkward} So, living in hyper cities would made an interesting life style for us.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture in social science class

[Alirrrrrr]

Thank you very much Luschen for your great tips. I hope to increase my writing level by the help of you.
Best wishes for you