review gre issue-If rituals did not exist, we would have invent them.

[Khushu]

If rituals did not exist, we would have invent them. We need ceremonies and rituals to help us define ourselves socially and culturally.
As human beings are social animal, rituals are part of our society. It brings happiness, joy and glory in our trite daily routein. It is true that rituals helps us to define ourselves socially and culturally that is why if it did not exist we would have to invent them. We need rituals because it makes us to celebrate our life. Additionally, it ameliorates our moral values and reflects our culture.
In our daily life surely many of us have expressed the following sentiments or some variation on it: “routine life is damn trite”. It is human tendency to penchant for excitement. Ceremonies and rituals provide us the occasion for celebration and wipe out all the stress and boredom from our life. Let me illustrate, In India people celebrate many festivals, each one has its own ritual reason behind it. For example, in India people celebrate Diwali because people believe that 5000 years ago god came on earth. Despite many people do not believe it is true, they also celebrate the festival. People always want a reason for celebration, and rituals and ceremonies can be the best reason. Ceremonies and rituals provides us the golden chance to spend our time with family and friends.
Furthermore, people accept rituals as the unbreakable fact of their life. We learn about rituals in childhood itself and we blindly follow them because it gives the positive direction to our life. It teaches us the difference between good and bad. For example, when my sister and I was a child our mother thought us that if we hurt some one god will punish us. We do not know the efficacy of this statement but it made us a wise person. Same way rituals teach us to help who are in need, have mercy for everyone, forgive your enemies and many more. Rituals drive our life towards positivity and magnanimity.
Moreover, ceremonies and rituals indirectly reflect our culture and social values. Rituals that people follow are product of though process of their ancestors. People simply follow the orthodox. For example, in Muslim cast it is mandatory for woman to cover their face all the time. According to them it reflects the respect for woman. Nevertheless many people think that it implies that they do not provide freedom for woman.
In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies make our lives more enthusiastic and generous. Perhaps, if rituals did not exists, we would have created it to flourish our lives with great delights.

[Luschen]

Hi, your writing was pretty good. Overall, though your essay didn’t seem as well organized as it could have been. You have three points, but I don’t clearly see how they relate to one overarching idea. Also, what was the prompt or question you were answering. Are you supposed to write an essay in response to your first sentence? It was a little unclear to me what exactly was the question the prompt was asking.

@Khushu

If rituals did not exist, we would have [to] invent them. We need ceremonies and rituals to help us define ourselves socially and culturally.
As human beings are social animal[s ], rituals are part of our society. It brings [They bring] happiness, joy and glory in[to] our trite daily routein[routine]. It is true that rituals helps[help] us to define ourselves socially and culturally that is why if it[they] did not exist we would have to invent them. We need rituals because it makes[they allow] us to celebrate our life. Additionally, it ameliorates[they ameliorates] our moral values and reflects our culture. {this intro seems to have a lot of repetition and unsubstantiated statements - I realize it is just an introduction, but you need to provide some support to your statements}
In our daily life surely many of us have expressed the following sentiments or some variation on it: “routine life is damn trite”.{“trite” sounds a bit odd when describing a life} It is human tendency to [have a] penchant for excitement. Ceremonies and rituals provide us the occasion for celebration and wipe out all the stress and boredom from our life. Let me illustrate,{period or semicolon} In India people celebrate many festivals, each one has its own ritual reason behind it. For example, in India people celebrate Diwali because people believe that 5000 years ago god came on {“came to earth” or “appeared on earth”} earth. Despite [the fact that] many people do not believe it is true, they also[still] celebrate the festival. People always want a reason for celebration, and rituals and ceremonies can be the best reason. Ceremonies and rituals provides us the golden chance to spend our time with family and friends.
Furthermore, people accept rituals as the unbreakable fact of their li[ves]. We learn about rituals in childhood itself and we blindly follow them because it gives[they give] the positive direction to our life. It teaches us the difference between good and bad. For example, when my sister and I was a child [were children] our mother thought[taught] us that if we hurt some one[someone] god will punish us. We do not know the efficacy{do you mean “truthfulness” here?} of this statement but it made us a wise person. [In the] Same way[,] rituals teach us to help who are in need, have mercy for everyone, forgive your{don’t switch from “us” to “your” in this sentence} enemies and many more. Rituals drive our li[ves] towards positivity and magnanimity.
Moreover, ceremonies and rituals indirectly reflect our culture and social values. Rituals that people follow are product[s ] of though process{“of thought process” does not make sense - do you mean “thought process”? that doesn’t make that much sense either} of their ancestors. People simply follow the orthodox. For example, in [the] Muslim cast[culture] it is mandatory for woman to cover their face all the time. According to them it reflects the respect for wom[en]. Nevertheless many people think that it implies that they do not provide freedom for woman.{try to explain this a bit more completely}
In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies make our lives more enthusiastic{saying your life is enthusiastic sounds a bit odd} and generous. Perhaps, if rituals did not exists[exist], we would have created it to flourish{“embellish” seems better here} our lives with great delights.