Please rate my essy. (Thank you very much in advance)

People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, and increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There are a lot o reasons why people prefer to achieve serious education at universities. Usually this choice is based on several reasons such as good career prospects, popularity of university education and opportunity to reach high social status.
First of all, success at work depends on educational level of a person because employers prefer to have personal with high education. According to the recent research, in Bulgaria more than 80 percentage of workers in well-known companies are with diploma from university.
The second reason is that nowadays possession of university diploma has become important part of modern life. For example, among my friends who are young people a person without university degree is not a much admired person. This situation is connected with opinion that absence of university degree is not very suitable for modern people.
Finally, present generation of people believe that success in life and opportunity to reach serious position in a particular organisation associates with a university degree. Obviously, this is reasonable statement, for instance, in the USA almost all famous people are with a university or college degree.
University degree always has been good contribution for an excellent career and a chance to face a success. Also, university degree has become a part of modern life and feature of modern generation of people.

TOEFL listening lectures: The professor mentions watermelons as an example of what?

People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, and increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There are a lot o reasons why people prefer to achieve serious education at universities. Usually this choice is based on several reasons such as good career prospects, popularity of university education and opportunity to reach high social status.
First of all, success at work depends on THE educational level of a person because employers prefer to have personNEL with high education. According to the recent research, in Bulgaria more than 80 percentage of workers in well-known companies ALL HAVE diplomaS from university.
The second reason is that nowadays possession of A university diploma has become AN important part of modern life. For example, among my friends(,) who are ALL young people(,) a person without A university degree is not a much admired person. This situation is connected with opinion that THE absence of A university degree is not very suitable for modern people.
Finally, THE present generation of people believe that success in life and opportunitIES to reach SENIOR positionS in a particular organisation associates with a university degree. Obviously, this is A reasonable statement(.) For instance, in the USA almost all famous people are HOLDERS OF a university or college degree.
A university degree HAS always has been A good contributionTOWARD an excellent career and a chance to ACHIEVE success. Also, A university degree has become a part of modern life and A feature of THE modern generation of people.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Not bad Svyatoslavkn. Review closely.

Kitos. 8/10