Please help me to correct this letter.

Please help me to correct this letter.

Dear Miss. Xio
First, I want to thank you for your kind attention to my questions. Having successfully prepared the XXX and also observed its behavior under X-ray diffraction. My future work towards investigating the XXX behavior under dynamic conditions. As a part of my research, I want to study effect of XXX composition on corrosion. In your paper which is titled “XYZ” you have not fully investigated the XXX composition on corrosion, and it was left with no more discussion about it. I will be really pleased if you could advise me from where I can start to study this subject.
Thank you very much

Dear Miss. Xio

First, I want to thank you for your kind attention to my questions. Having successfully prepared the XXX and also observed its behavior under X-ray diffraction., I intend to direct my future work towards investigating the XXX behavior under dynamic conditions. As a part of my research, I want to study the effect of XXX composition on corrosion. In your paper which is titled “XYZ” you have not fully investigated the XXX composition on corrosion, and as a result there was no defining discussion. I would be really pleased if you could advise me of a starting point from which I can study this subject.

Thank you very much.

Yours sincerely,