Personal Statement

A few months back you guys had reviewed my essay for Kent University’s Scholarship Essay . I did not get the scholarship but I did decide to take a gap year because I got good grades and can apply to a much better university .
Please review my Personal Statement whenever you have the time .Thanks in advance :slight_smile:

<statement removed at member’s request>

TOEFL listening lectures: Why does the professor mention New York Harbor?

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Hi, I think this essay is excellent - only a few suggestions I could find. Maybe accountancy is the correct term in England - it is called accounting in the US.

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Thank you sir , I have made the respective changes , I also asked one of my friends to review my essay but I’m not that satisfied with this feedback , can you please tell me if anything he says makes sense .

<statement removed at member’s request>

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and it is called Accountancy in India and England :slight_smile:

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Hi, I think this is excellent feedback. My comment of “excellent” was based on your grammar and writing ability, not necessarily on your content. Your friend obviously has a very good idea of what they are looking for in a personal statement. Unfortunately, my main experience in personal statements is the one I wrote for myself, and that was 20 years ago. My only slight disagreement would be that I think you can mention your future plans, as long as you tie those directly into your current interests and the degree you are seeking. I agree though that all the talk about money and helping your family is not really appropriate.

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Thank you for the feedback sir . I still have over a week left so I’m gonna that time to write a much better Personal Statement .

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