IELTS Writing Task 1: Bar chart 4

Dear teacher,

Please help me check my friend’s report.

Thank you very much

The given bar chart compares three different types of phones in terms of the figure of calls length in the UK from 1995 to 2002.

Overall, the most popular choice of phone consumer is the local line, the l ess used one is the mobile line, but overtimes, this line has risen significantly.

In 1995, the number of users made calls through local line is the most popular of three call types, with a proximately 72 billions of minute total in call length. Mobiles at this times hadn’t been used much with just 4 billions of minutes of call times. For the next 4 years, the number of local line users kept rising steadily. The same trend applied for Mobiles users but with a slight increase in call times. The national and international line is the second popular line with 38 billion minutes.

The number of local call users reaches its peak in 1999 with 90 billion in call length but soon declined to 72 billion minutes in 2000. By contrast, mobiles users keep increasing but this time with a more rapid pace, till 2000, it’s users had reached to 48 billion minutes of total call times. The national and international line had a steady trend of increasing overtimes, till 2000, it’s call times had been increased to nearly 62 billion minutes of total call length.

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Sorry, I did not get as far as I wanted this evening, I will have to continue tomorrow!

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Thank you very much, I’m looking forward to your help.
<3

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Hi, make sure that you are very clear that the data given is only the total number of minutes spent on different types of phone calls.
At various parts of your report, it sounded like you were talking about the number of users or the average call length, neither of which is given by the chart. It is always important not to say too much or add additional information - you can only discuss what has been provided to you.
Here are some specific comments:

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Dear teacher.
This feedback is extremely helpful.

Thank you,

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