I need your help for revising my essay.......!

[Bienvenue]

are you agree or disagree that studying at a college provides many opportunities for students than studyng at a traditional school?
I am agree that studying at a private college provides many previleges for pupils than studying at a traditional school on account of many reasons . I am going to explain three prominent reasons below, including teaching methods of the private college, conditions the private college supplies for students, and wonderful guidance services.
Firstly, students have many previleges by studying at a private college thanks to many conditions are provided for students by the private college. During the studying, many students benefit a lot of activities, various games, interesting researching actions, etc. done at the private college. With the help of these activities, they can learn efficently and also easily. For example, when I studied at university I had a mission, given by professor as a researching midd-term work, at the private college as regard whether activities done at the college help them learn attractively or not. I absolutely observed that they are the best ways to accelerate the learning.
Secondly, the private college uses many different methods than the conventional school within the class. Teaching ways of the private school are very technological and usefull. They are impressively innovative , and appripriorate to the requirements of the age. The ways the private college use are not only reaching to the results, but also avaluating the process. For instance, todays students who attents the private college are more innovative than their peers studying at a conventional school in order to attain the knowledge.
Finally, the private school provides wonderful guidance services for students by keeping them under observation during their studying at the collge. İf a student have a matter, org et in trouble in and out of the college, teachers supplying guidance services can help them rapidly and teach them that how to deal with the problem within the incident. As an example, if a student takes part in an incident, which is not legally true, his guide can tell her/him properly that it is not good thing for a student .

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation in a professor’s office between a professor and a student

[Bienvenue]

heyyyy please ı need your helps. luschen could you take a look on my essay*

[Luschen]

Hi, I don’t think you copied the essay prompt correctly. I have no idea what a “traditional school” is. i would say most colleges are traditional. Maybe it means private vs public college, which I what I think you are addressing, but that does not sound right to me. Hopefully my comments below will still be helpful.

@Bienvenue

are[Do] you agree or disagree that studying at a college provides many[more] opportunities for students than studyng{sp} at a traditional school? {why errors in the prompt? Did you cut and paste? What is the difference between a college and a “traditional school”?}
I am agree that studying at a private college provides many previleges for pupils than studying at a traditional school on account of many reasons . I am going to explain three prominent reasons below, including teaching methods of the private college, conditions the private college supplies for students, and wonderful guidance services. {once again, add a few sentences to ease the reader into your essay - “In our modern society, getting a good education has become critical. Some students prefer to go to college, while others believe a traditional school is better.” - something like that}
Firstly, students have[gain] many previleges{sp} by studying at a private college thanks to many[outstanding] conditions are provided for students by the private college. During the[ir] stud[ies], many students benefit a lot of [from the many] activities, various games, interesting researching actions, etc. [and so on] done at the private college. With the help of these activities, they can learn efficently{sp} and also easily. For example, when I studied at university I had a mission, given by professor as a [mid-term] researching midd-term work,[project] at the private college as regard[ing] whether activities done at the college help them[students] learn attractively[effectively] or not. I absolutely observed that they{state what “they” is} are the best ways to accelerate the learning.
Secondly, the private college uses many different methods than the conventional school within the class. Teaching ways[methods] of the private school are very technological and usefull[based on technology and very useful]. They are impressively innovative , and appripriorate{sp} to the requirements of the [students’] age{or by age do you mean “modern society”}. The ways[methods] the private college use are not only [for] reaching to the results, but also avaluating{sp} the process. For instance, todays students who attents[attend] the private college are more innovative than their peers studying at a conventional school in order to[in] attain[ning] the knowledge.
Finally, the private school provides wonderful guidance services for students by keeping them under observation during their studying at the collge{sp}. İf a student have a matter[problem], org et in trouble in and out of the college, teachers supplying guidance services can help them rapidly and teach them that how to deal with the problem within[or] the incident. As an example, if a student takes part in an incident, which is not legally true[an illegal activity], his guide can tell her/him properly that it is not good thing for a student .

{add a conclusion to sum up your arguments}

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation in a professor’s office between a professor and a student

[Bienvenue]

thank you again luschen. i absolutely cut and pasted it. I think I had many mistakes in that essay, however, i am going to correct all of them thanks to your help…