Hi Luschen, Please check and grade my essay.

[Minhct2611]

Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer

University has a significant role in our lives. University not only provides a good place for us to improve our knowledge but also has developed many policies for university students. Among these policies, attending classes is the most important policy. When students attend classes, they can get extra knowledge from professors , teachers and other people. Furthermore,University students have more close friendship with their teachers and their classmate. It is also a good way for university students to have responsibilities and discipline as well as working hard.

Firstly, Attending classes helps university students get extra knowledge. Professors teach university students a lot of information and knowledge that do not have in any books.These information and knowledge comes from the real experience and others from summarizing a lot of books. Furthermore, Professors usually teach university students a good way to get all knowledge from their lectures. Moreover, when university students have problem ,their teachers can help them to solve these difficulties as well as to improve their ideas. So, attending classes is the best way for university students to get knowledge.

Secondly, attending classes also promote close relationship with the teachers and other students. Students work with other people in many projects, they can exchange ideas as well as discuss to find better methods to finish work together. Furthermore , they can work with instructions of professors, the professors give them advice and experience to solve problems. Therefore, Students not only have more time to work and understand their job but also foster close relationships with professors and other people.

Thirdly, University students have reponsibilities and discipline when they attend university. In the university, students have some tasks which they work with other people. Each student undertake a part of tasks and they must finish their job. For example, when my classmates and I do our assignment about computer. I research actions of Rom and Ram, other people study actions of monitor, Cpu and et cetera. Everyone must write their report to finish my team `s work. So, university help us have duty about our job and discipline.

All at all, Attending university bring us extra knowledge and promote close relationship as well as reponsibilities and discipline . I think that many universities not only should compel students attending classes but also develop many better policies for their students.

TOEFL listening discussions: Two roommates talking about fraternities

[Luschen]

Hi, I didn’t think this one was quite as strong as some of your other essays. You seem to go back and forth between going to university and actually attending class. I wished you had used more detailed examples. You had that one, but it took place outside of the classroom, so didn’t really support your thesis. Your writing was pretty good though and your ideas were presented clearly. You had a lot of incorrectly capitalized words though - I’m not sure what caused that. Overall, I would rate this a 3.5 out of 5.

@Minhct2611

Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to explain your answer

University has[plays] a significant role in our lives. University not only provides a good place for us to improve our knowledge but also has developed many policies for university students.{these two ideas don’t seem closely related - one is positive, the other is neutral or maybe negative} Among these policies, attending classes is the most important policy. {this sounds a bit stilted - “… classes is the most important” is better, but still not the best} When students attend classes, they can get extra knowledge from professors , teachers and other people. Furthermore, [ u]niversity students have more close friendship[s ] {or “have closer friendship with”} with their teachers and their classmate[s ]. It is also a good way for university students to have responsibilities and discipline as well as working hard.{this could be more parallel} {I prefer a shorter summary of your reasons - with these longer ones, the thesis statement ends up getting a little lost in the middle of your introduction}

Firstly, [ a]ttending classes helps university students get extra knowledge. Professors teach university students a lot of information and knowledge that do not have[are not found] in any books.[Some] Th[is ] information and knowledge comes from the real experience and[, while] others [come] from summarizing a lot of books. {this last phrase still sounds a bit awkward} Furthermore, [ p]rofessors usually teach university students a good way to get all knowledge from their lectures. Moreover, when university students have problem ,their teachers can help them to solve these difficulties as well as to improve their ideas. So, attending classes is the best way for university students to get knowledge. {this is ok, but I think a couple detailed examples sound better and show more development than a list of reasons like this}

Secondly, attending classes also promote[s ] close relationship[s ] with[between] the teachers and other[their] students. {or maybe you meant - “… close relationships with one’s teacher and fellow students”} Students work with other [classmates] people in many projects, [so] they can exchange ideas as well as discuss{“converse” is better - discuss really needs an object} to find better methods to finish [their] work together. Furthermore , they can work with instructions of professors, the professors give them advice and experience to solve problems. {who is they? are we still talking about project groups? this is unclear} Therefore, [ s]tudents not only have more time to work and understand their job but also foster close relationships {this is saying “students have time to foster close relationships”, but I don’t think that is what you mean} with professors and other people.

Thirdly,{I like a little more variety in paragraph transitions - this sounds too much like bullet points} [ u]niversity students have reponsibilities and discipline when they attend university. {make sure to tie each topic sentence back to the thesis - this is about attending class, not just attending university - you could attend a university and never go to class apart from taking the tests or turning in your work} In the university, students have some tasks [in] which they work with other people. Each student undertake[s ] a part of [the entire] tasks {or “each student undertakes different tasks”} and they must finish their job. For example, when my classmates and I d[id] our assignment about computer[s, ] I research[ed] actions of Rom and Ram, [while] other people stud[ied the] actions of [the] monitor, Cpu and et cetera. Everyone must [had to] write their report to finish my team `s work. So, university help[s ] us have duty {“have duty” sounds odd here} about our job and discipline. {this paragraph did not really support your thesis. You never mentioned attending class and all these teamwork activities sounded like they took part outside of the classroom}

All at all, [ a]ttending university bring[s ] us extra knowledge and promote[s ] close relationship as well as reponsibilit[y ] and discipline . I think that many universities not only should compel students attending [to attend] classes but also develop many better policies for their students.

TOEFL listening discussions: Two roommates talking about fraternities