Hello, I need your help to correct this essay.. Thanks In advance :)

English as a Second Language Preparation for and help with the TOEFL® Test and
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The expression " ever, never give up" means to keep trying and never stop working for your goals. Do you agree or disagree with this tatement? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Life has many obstacles that we will face them every day or every situation. We must prepare ourselves to confront all difficulties. If we give up on our dreams and let it go by the first struggle we would face, we can’t achieve any progress in our life and it will become disappointing. Life will go on so, we must live it with an honour of trying. I totally agree with whenever we have a goal, we mustn’t give up on it. I feel this way for the reasons which I will explore.

First, I must keep trying to reach my goal, how knows that if I keep working on my goal a little bit more, I would finally reach it. So, I mustn’t get boring in the middle of the way. I must be patient and work on the reasons that make my dream pathway shorter, intelligence and learn how to be endurance. All of these virtues must be learned and applied. The more I overcome challenges, the more I obtain my goals. My personal experience is a great example of this.I used to be overweight. It has a bad effect on my health and my look. I was disappointed and refused to go out with my friends and lived my true age. I decide to loss weight and become healthier for myself. I started eating healthy food and go to the gym and increasing my daily activities.I faced downs a lot but I put my bodyweight goal in front of my eyes. It has taken 6 months from me to be in the ideal weight and too many struggles and resistances which they have been beat. Nowadays, I keep working out every day and I become healthier and I definitely satisfied about my shape and health.
So that is way I will never give up on my dreams, and I give myself a promise to keep going and never getting tired form attempting.

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This sentence contains several rather basic grammar problems that you should be able to correct yourself if you really want to write essays.

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Hello, I thank you for your concedration. I need your opinion on what I wrote.
can you tell me the mistakes to improve my writing please

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Maybe the sentence should be " There are many obstacles in life we face them daily"

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I suggest you start reading texts in English. In addition, you should also transcribe audio recordings to make sure you write down each sentence in the exact same way it was recorded. That’s the best method for you to learn basic grammar structures. Please stop creating your own grammar rules.

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Thank you. I would appreciate your criticism if you helped me to know my writing weakness. Next time I will focus more on these mistakes.

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The expression “never ever give up” means to keep trying and never to stop working for your goals. Do you agree or disagree with this statement ? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Life has obstacles that we have to face every day or in every situation. We must prepare ourselves to confront all difficulties. If we give up our dreams when we fail at our first attempt, we can’t achieve any progress in life. The failure may be disappointing but we must keep trying. I totally agree with the statement that whenever we have a goal, we must never ever give it up .

First, I must set my goal and then keep trying to reach it . If I keep working more and more to achieve my goal, I will finally reach it. So, I mustn’t get discouraged in the middle of the way. I must patiently pursue my dream and learn how to endure the pains I might suffer on my way .

The more we face challenges and overcome difficulties , the closer we move towards our goals. My personal experience is a great example of this. I used to be overweight. It had a bad effect on my health and my appearance . I was so disappointed that I was reluctant to go out with my friends. I decided to lose weight and become healthier myself. I started eating healthy food and going to the gym. I increased my daily physical activities. I faced a lot of tension but I put my goal of losing bodyweight above everything else . It took six months for me to be of ideal weight though I had to struggle a lot . As I continue to keep myself fit with normal weight , I remain fully satisfied with my shape and health.

So, my own experience has taught me the lesson that I should never ever give up my efforts until I achieve my goals.

(Mr Shurooq, to add to what Torsten has advised you, let me say that the process of learning involves four stages: Listening, Speaking, Reading and Writing (LSRW).
You can see that writing is the last stage. Before starting to write an essay, please ensure that you listen, speak and read as much as you can. When you decide to write, you may follow this mnemonic: CODER which stands for Conceive (think), Organize (arrange), Develop (expand) and then Express (write). But ONLY after the last step ‘Revise’ (edit, proofread, correct etc.) should you publish it for others to read!)

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Thank you. You are right. Yes, I begin with writing and don’t know what is the problem. I will arrange my schedule. Thank you again

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