Formal examinations are not the best method of assessing educational achievement.

Hi tutor,
Here is my IELTS essay and I really appreciate your correction because I’m quite new here. Thank you so much

Topic: “Many people believe that formal “pen and paper” examinations are not the best method of assessing educational achievement”
What is your view of examination?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Formal examinations are one of the most common methods to measure learners’ cognition and intelligence. Although “pen and paper” exam scores are widely accepted, this assessment has shown its drawbacks over times. Consequently, it is believed that conventional examinations are no longer feasible to assess educational achievement and their usage needs to be reconsidered.

The prevalent use of formal exams clearly brings about several benefits. With a view to providing equality, exams are conducted under fair conditions. Test takers must stay in a room with teacher’s inspection and answer questions of similar difficulty. In addition, one reason for “pen and paper” exams recognition is that the test scores give a virtual evaluation of learners’ understandings, so that teachers can rank them later on the basis of their performance.

On the other hand, some shortcomings of conventional exams have been exposed. During an examination, various factors, such as students’ health conditions and anxiety, may affect their performance tremendously. Furthermore, tests are often predictable, so test taker can prepare for them by rote learning without underlying knowledge. Since, educational dishonesty while learners sit for an exam is not unusual, those behaviors make the results unreliable and baffle teachers’ evaluation precision.

Due to all concerns mentioned above, it is necessary to reconsider the importance of formal examinations. In addition to conventional method, educators should set more store on student’s performance on class or lecture. The learning process and exam scores may share equivalent contribution to final result of students, and examinations also need to be relevant to what is taught at schools.

In conclusion, “pen and paper” exams clearly have a role to play in assessment of learner’s performance. However, they should be carefully designed and supplemented with other measurements.

TOEFL listening lectures: What is the professor’s opinion of Ragwort?

Hi and welcome to the forum. You obviously are quite gifted in English and your essay is excellent. The main problem I have is that I am not sure your thesis statement accurately reflects the rest of your essay. You say “conventional examinations are no longer feasible”. That is a strong statement and means that these tests should not be used at all. Yet in your essay you give some advantages of these tests and conclude by saying they should still be used, but supplemented by other measures. I think if you tone down your thesis a bit, perhaps by saying that pen and paper tests alone are not adequate, but must be supplemented, then it would correctly sum up your views. Other than that, they only problems I see are some vocabulary that does not quite fit the context in which it is used. Here are my suggestions:

Thank you so much for the very detailed correction