Essay: Technology

Hi leaders, please help me check this essay. Thank you in advance
Students today can easily access information online, so libraries are no longer necessary.

Do you agree or disagree?

Owing to the absence of the internet, approaching information on internet platforms become easier than ever before, therefore many assume that libraries can be antiquated. Although the benefits information online can be seen, I disagree with the idea that libraries become futile.

On the one hand, it is impossible to deny that the substantial advantages that the internet deliver to student’s lives. In fact, students are able to access to the huge storage of information just by a few clicks in eye-blinks, users in various fields can effortlessly retrieve their desired information without having to take too much time. Another merit of this advancement is the convenience to access human knowledge. This is because informative websites like Wikipedia site are widely available and accessible, which make geographic adversities become irrelevant, thus students can search their wanted information no matter where they are

On the other hand, I believe that libraries still hold the importance position in student’s study. By using libraries, learners can acquire authentic and reliable information since the majority of data are studied, filtered and organized by authors before being published officially. In addition, libraries can be seen as a good place for building social skill. Since libraries are not only filled with a large number of books but also provide the quiet place for for students to self-study or gather together to share ideas, which help them enhance the power of analysis and teamwork skills.

In conclusion, although students also accrue a number of advantaged from retrieving information through the internet platforms, it seems to me that libraries are still an indispensable part in studying due to above outlined merits

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Hi Nancy, to be honest, this essay seemed a bit weaker than some of your other recent essays. Your first body paragraph does not really support your thesis that you disagree that libraries are no longer necessary. Maybe you could say, “Yes, the internet has some advantages, but for many people, like the very poor or homeless, the library is the only way to access the internet.” Some people are too poor to own a computer or pay for an internet connection, so the free computers at the library are vital for them. Each paragraph in your essay should support your main argument, which is contained in your thesis. You only need to address both sides of the argument if the prompt asks you to, by stating “discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion.” You had some good ideas in your essay, but many of your words were not suitable and you had some errors in sentence structure. Here are some specific suggestions:

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Hi my leader, please check my essay again, thank you.
By means of the availability of the internet, retrieving information through internet-based platforms has become easier than ever before, therefore, many individuals tend to assume that libraries are antiquated. Personally, although the benefits the internet brings can be seen, I disagree with the notion that libraries are antiquated.

To begin with, it is impossible to deny the substantial advantages that the internet delivers to student’s studies. In fact, learners are able to access to the large storehouse of diverse sources of information just by a few clicks in the eye-blinks. By making good use of such technology, users in various fields can effortlessly retrieve their desired data without taking too much time. Another good point of this advancement is the convenience in accessing human knowledge no matter where they are. With internet-connected devices such as smartphone or tablets, information retrieval become simple, even when they are in public transport, and this may a great deal for those who have a busy schedules

However, I believe that the libraries still hold the most important position in studying in schools or university. By using libraries, learners can acquire authentic and reliable information, since the majority of data found in books has been studied, filtered and organized by authors before being published officially. Also, libraries can be seen as a good place for mastering social skills. Since libraries are not only filled with a large number of books but also provide a quiet place for students to self-study or gather together to share ideas, which help them enhance the power of analysis and teamwork skills.

In addition, students may accrue a number of advantages from collecting information through the websites, it seems to me that libraries plays an indispensable role in compiling data for studying and develop their necessary soft skills.

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Hi, here are my suggestions:

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