Luschen
December 21, 2011, 2:37pm
1
Hi, this is a good essay. You still need to work on you subject/verb agreement and your prepositions. Also, see my comment about your Hitler reference.
In my opinion a good leader have [has] to be very confident in himself. That [He] must be a person who is able to gather people around him and to [,] lead them in all kind of situations and not to leave [abandon them] in hard times, [new sentence] as the saying goes: " …in sickness as in health, in poverty as in wealth, in sorrow as in joy, and will be true to you by God’s grace, trusting in Him, so long as we shall live". The real leader must be able to give people hope, because hope was and is one of the most important thing[either one of the most important thingS or the most important thing]. For example Adolf Hitler, even if he was a Nazi, he was a great leader for his country. He gave a hope, brought political stability, self-belief and a sense of security to people. {just an editorial comment - I realize what you are saying, but here in the US, Hitler is so reviled that saying anything positive about him may be a bad idea for an essay like this} But my [“preferred” or “type of”] leader, as a peace builder, is Mahatma Gandhi, “Father of [the] Nation”. The person who got freedom for his nation without war, sacrificing even his own life. The thing I like the most in him is that, whatever change he wanted people to make, he started that change from [in] himself. His famous quote is: " You must be the change you wish to see in the world. " He always tried to solve the conflicts without war, and showed his protest by hunger strikes. People remember and respect him even today.were [was] very stressful for all our [us] girls from Azerbaijan. She was saying about Karabakh that [those] kind[s ] of things which Azerbaijani will never accept. Most of us began crying when we saw Shusha at [on] the screen. Some of the girls couldn’t bare [bear] it anymore and was [were] ready to begin a quarrel. As I’m [I was] working in the organization that brought them as participants I had to do something to solve the situation[“solve the conflict” or “solve the problem” or “improve the situation” - you can’t really solve a situation]. I gathered all of them in another room and explained that these people do not appreciate [recognize] Karabakh as Azerbaijani territory,[semicolon] they consider it their motherland and we have to deal with it before Karabakh will be ours again, so we can’t interfere in the politics because it doesn’t make sense for now.[try to split this sentence into 2 or 3 smaller ones] After my speech they became calmer and we continued the evening without any quarrels.
TOEFL listening discussions: What is the purpose of this meeting?