Essay: Borrowing money from a friend

[Hoangle308]

It is sometimes said that borrowing money from a friend can harm or damage the friendship. Do you agree? why or why not? Use reasons and specific example to explain your answer.
Many people have been always feared that they will loose their friends if they borrow money from their friends. In my point of view, I strongly believe that asking friends for financial help can not create negative impact on friendship. There appeared numerous reasons explaining for this phenomenon. My writing will deeply analyze main reasons.
To begin with, I firmly think that people need a lot of time to build faith in close relationship with their friends, so they are ready to help friends who are sometimes out of money as possible. Take me as an example, I have a good buddy who lent me amount of money to buy a book I liked when I was 10 years old. I shared my problem that I didn’t raise enough money to get the book and needed his financial help. He was pleasant to allow to pay a part of the book’s price for me without demanding me to give back immediately. Consequently, friendship between I and he has become closer.
The second reason I claim that borrowing money from a friend don’t threaten friendship is that lenders actually know that someday, they may lack money and borrowers can be able to assist. This is because that each time people receive help from buddies when being in trouble of finance, they will always remember and respect it. Therefore, they will attempt to figure out ways to help their friends who supported them to surpass difficults in the past. Needless to say, this absolutely brings about positive benefits on enhancing relationship between friends
By the way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above. I’m of opinion that in the most cases it is very beneficial for people to not only borrow, but also lend money from their friends because this creates undeniable benefits on developing friendship.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between two students at the library

[Beeesneees]

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[Luschen]

Hi Hoangle, thought your essay was pretty good. You have an effective structure, but it would be better to have a strong thesis statement that can stand on its own. Your examples were good and your ideas were clear, but you had quite a few grammatical errors and several sentences that were awkward and a bit unclear. Overall, I would rate this a 3.5 out of 5.

@Hoangle308

It is sometimes said that borrowing money from a friend can harm or damage the friendship. Do you agree? why or why not? Use reasons and specific example to explain your answer.
Many people have been always feared that they will lo[se] their friends if they borrow money from [them]their friends. In{“From” is better here} my point of view, I strongly believe that asking friends for financial help can not create [a] negative impact on friendship. There appeared[are] numerous reasons explaining for this phenomenon.{what phenomenon? negative impacts on friendship? this is a little unclear} My writing will deeply analyze main reasons.{I don’t really like this thesis statement. Also, I don’t think you can “deeply analyze” anything in only a few hundred words}
To begin with, I firmly think that people need a lot of time to build faith in close relationship[s ] with their friends, so they are ready to help friends who are sometimes out of money as possible.{“as possible” doesn’t make sense here} Take me as an example,{semicolon or colon} I have a good buddy who lent me amount of [some] money to buy a book I liked when I was 10 years old. I shared my problem that I didn’t [had not] raise[d ] {this sounds like you are taking donations} enough money to get the book and needed his financial help. He was pleasant to allow [offer] to pay a part of the book’s price for me without demanding me to give [pay it] back immediately. Consequently, [the] friendship between I and he{“between him and me” is more correct} has become closer.
The second reason I claim that borrowing money from a friend don’t[does not] {also, avoid using contractions in essays} threaten friendship is that lenders actually know that someday, they may lack money and [friends who are borrowing now] borrowers {“borrowers” was not that clear before} can be able to assist. This is because that each time people receive help from buddies when being in [financial]trouble of finance, they will always remember and respect it. Therefore, they will attempt to figure out ways to help their friends who supported them to [overcome difficulties] surpass difficults in the past. Needless to say, this absolutely brings about positive benefits on [by] enhancing relationship[s ] between friends
By the way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above.{comma} I’ [am] of [the] opinion that in the most cases it is very beneficial for people to not only borrow [from], but also lend money from[to] their friends because this creates undeniable benefits on{on is not really correct - maybe “for” or “to”} developing friendship.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between two students at the library