Dear Luschen, please correct my essay and grade it. Thank you so much

Question: It is generally believed that education is of vital importance to individual development and the well-being of societies. What should education consist of to fulfill both these functions?

It is no doubt education plays a key role in development of any individual or society. Seeing many inadequacies in the quality of present education systems in boosting individuals’ potential competence as well as in failing to contribute to societies’ prosperity, the question as to what education should offer has become heated. Discussed below will give some suggestions in terms of education’s composition.

Firstly, basic knowledge in a broad range of fields is a must. With a broaden foundation in natural and social science, students will be confident in comprehension the world as well as gaining self-consciousness and self-esteem when discuss topics with their peers and sharing opinions as an essential part in socializing in their later life. In fact, people have taken many actions to protect our planet due to what they have learned from school about it is time we had to preserve our natural mother. Also, it is evident that many people want to learn more about history and be so enthusiastic when they have chance to talk about their own how-known. They are considered educated no matter what level of education they have accomplished.

In addition to a wide range of knowledge, practical skills have to be highlighted in educational curriculum’s standards. These days, employers usually complaint about the graduates’ lacks of working skills such as fieldwork skill, time management skill, and their insufficiency in their daily duties at work. The blame is mainly on schools because students have spent a long time studying at school but they gain not relevant skills for their adult’s life. Therefore, it is necessary to emphasis the skills which help them to be successful such as how to cook, how to fix a car to how to update the latest technology and to solve problems efficiently in the information technology era.

Just the same, for the sake of societies, students should be taught to be good citizens. Not only have students learn about their responsibilities to the living environment but also how to take care of the others, especially the disable and the elderly are advised to be core strategies in the syllabus. The more caring and sympathy the children are, the safer and prosperous the society will be.

Education shapes the future world by all means. Hence, it is a hard mission to educators and authorities to establish an efficient educational curriculum for development of society as the whole. The right thing to do must be to prepare the next generation to become knowledgeable, working-proficient and responsible to their community.

TOEFL listening discussions: A conversation between a professor and his student

Hi Rose, please post these in the TOEFL section of the forum.