Could you please correct, comment and rate my essay? Thanks!

It has recently been announced that a large shopping center may be built in your neighborhood. Do you support or oppose this plan? Why? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

        Building another large shopping centre in my neighbourhood? I’d definitely say no to this plan. There is already a very big, and the largest in the district, shopping centre located right at the centre of the neighbourhood. In the plaza, hundreds of shops are selling various items from accessories to electronic appliances. These products are of different prices, from the cheapest to some of the top brands. The plaza also comprises of an ice-skating rink, a food court, a supermarket and a cinema. Walking fifteen minutes away, there is another huge shopping centre. Though slightly smaller in size, it also has a supermarket and a cinema. The credit is that things are much cheaper there. Virtually, nearly everything needed can be bought in my neighbourhood, conveniently for sure. I strongly believe that it’s unnecessary to build an extra one. It’s even somehow a waste of land and resources.
           Worse still, a series of problems are caused. My neighbourhood is rather crowded, with a generally high building density. I’m quite unsure about where the site for the construction can be. When the construction begins, it’s unpreventable that there will be noise and air pollution. The serious pollution problem will adversely affect the environment. For a period of time, people living around will not be able to enjoy peace and quietness. After the shopping centre is constructed, predictably, tourists will rush to it to catch a glimpse of it. I can’t imagine how crowded it will be, not to mention the traffic problem brought along.
              It’s undeniable that the new shopping centre will do some good. For instance, people can choose from an even greater variety of items. Along with fiercer competition between shops, prices of products may become even lower. However, we have to strike a balance between the cost and outcome before proposing any plan. In this case, I believe that the cost is much higher than the effectiveness. Is it really essential for us to have that wide variety of choices? After all, there are already two huge shopping centres around, and it’s very convenient for people to travel to the other shopping centres by taking the MTR. Perhaps the developer is eager to earn huge profits from the new shopping centre.
               Concluding all, it’s unnecessary and it causes social problems if a new shopping centre is built in my neighbourhood. I do hope that the district council will do something to stop the plan. People living in the community will demand for their rights as well. Honestly, I find every facility I need to use can be found in my neighbourhood. I can’t think of anything that should be added to the current features.


TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture by a professor of Archeology

Hi, I think your essay is excellent. Your introduction is very brief, but for this type of prompt I think it works pretty well. Your ideas are very good and show good development. Your structure is easy to follow and your vocabulary is good. You have a couple of words and phrases I would change, but nothing that affects your clarity. Overall, i would rate this a 4.5 out of 5.

Thank you so much! Your comments are very encouraging! I really appreciate your help. :slight_smile: