Could you evaulate my writing? I wonder your special comments and estimated band score

[Memo34]

Hi everyone! I am waiting for your feedback and estimated band score.

The table illustrates a restaurant’s average selling in Georgia Street, Dunsmuir Street and Drake Street in Vancouver in the year 2016.
Overall, the restaurant in Georgia Street made most profit among these three branch offices and the most popular item was a meal that sourced from chicken in all of them.

Regarding the number of transactions, it was at 854 in Georgia Street, while that were 750 and 390 in Dunsmuir Street and Drake Street, respectively. Additionally, we can see that average transaction value in Georgia Street was ($10,69) more than that of Dunsmuir and Drake Street, $5,61 and $9,02, respectively.

When it comes to the number of eat-in transactions, it seems that people ate in a restaurant in Georgia Street was much more than others and this figure was at 405. In comparison, we clearly see from the table, take-away culture was more common in Georgia Street than the others. Average number of these were 449 in Georgia Street, 392 in Dunsmuir Street and 190 in Drake Street. Eventually, items which made of chicken can be considered to be the most consumed meal.

[Torsten]

@Memo34

The table illustrates a restaurant’s average selling in Georgia Street, Dunsmuir Street and Drake Street in Vancouver in the year 2016.

You need ‘sales’ here instead of selling.

@Memo34

Overall, the restaurant in Georgia Street made most profit among these three branch offices and the most popular item was a meal that sourced from chicken in all of them.

Please don’t confuse sales with profit. We don’t know how much any of the restaurants made in profit. We only know their respective revenue/sales. Also, please note that ‘these three’ must be followed by the plural ‘branches’. Instead of ‘a meal that sourced from chicken’ I would use ‘a meal made from chicken’ or ‘based on chicken’.

[Memo34]

Thank you very much @Torsten. What about sellings?

@Torsten

You need ‘sales’ here instead of selling.

Which words can I use instead of the word “transaction”?

@Torsten

Also, please note that ‘these three’ must be followed by the plural ‘branches’.

I used “branch offices”. Is it wrong?

[Torsten]

@Memo34

Which words can I use instead of the word “transaction”?

Transaction doesn’t work here because you need a word describing an amount of money generated through sales.

@Memo34

I used “branch offices”. Is it wrong?

Since we are talking about restaurants ‘outlets’ or simply ‘restaurants’ is much more appropriate than ‘branch offices’