CAN YOU PLEASE READ MY TOEFL ESSAY AND CORRECT IF NECESSARY???PRETTY PLEASE ??

I appreciate your help

  1. People recognize a difference between children and adults. What events (experiences or ceremonies) make a person an adult? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your answer.

Childhood and adulthood are both important stages of a human’s life but there are many differences seen between a child and an adult. Adults and children differ in many ways but there are certain events that may help us to recognize an adult from a child such as, age, knowledge and psychological maturity.

Many people believe that age determines whether a person is an adult or a child. In most countries after someone reaches the age 18 they are considered an adult, this is mostly because it is believed that when a person reaches the age 18 they have gathered enough experience throughout their lives that can help them start managing an independent life on their own; therefore age can help recognize a child form an adult.

One of the important differences between a child and adult is the knowledge they have gathered throughout the years. Knowledge gathered in school or through experiencing different events during one’s life is what really helps a person to make the right decisions and be able to handle all the responsibilities of an adult. For example, small relationships between students and teachers or students and other students at school gives children knowledge about further relationships in their lives or knowledge gained from study books can help children their adulthood stages. In brief, besides age, the amount of knowledge can also determine adulthood.

Finally, a very important difference between a child and adult is their level of psychological maturity. Psychological maturity doesn’t come with age but it comes with a child’s lifestyle and life experiences. Maturity encompasses being aware of the correct time and place to behave and knowing when to act appropriately, according to the situation and the culture of the society one lives in; therefore a true adult is an adult that has become psychologically mature enough.

 All in all, there are several different ways to recognize a child from an adult whether physical or mentally but an adult can only be truly recognized when they start an independent life and start handling their own responsibilities after they have reached a certain age using their knowledge and psychological maturity.

TOEFL listening lectures: A lecture from a marine biology class

Hi, your writing is outstanding with only a few errors. Unfortunately, I do not think you addressed the prompt correctly. The prompt says “what events” make a person an adult. To me these might include getting a driver’s license, getting a job, going to college, going through a religious ceremony like confirmation or a bar mitzvah, leaving home. Instead your essay seems to be answering the question “what characteristics to adults have?” or “what is the difference between a child and an adult?”. It is very important to answer the prompt correctly, they might give you a 0 out of 5 for “rejecting the topic”. In your case, your essay obliquely refers to the topic, but I think they would still mark you down significantly.

Thank You very much