Can you give me band score for my essay?

English as a Second Language English Vocabulary, Grammar and Idioms
#1

Hi everyone! I had an accident two days ago but I am good. I hope you are fine, too. I am waiting for your feedback and estimated band score. @Anglophile @Arinker @Hristina-59.Varna @Sumejja

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It is believed that if parents allow their children’s daily wishes, children would be selfish individuals in a society. On the other hand, some people think that making a choice for children is important if decisions affect them. In my opinion, it is essential for children in order to make decisions about issues that impact their life.

First of all, it is clearly known that children are lack of ability of thinking logically and making decisions truly. Thus, parents should select best options for their children and lead them. In other words, parents should not expect everything from them. For example, when the time came to make a decision for studying at university, parents should take an action and play a vital role in this period because they have much more experience rather than their child.

When it comes to the allowing children for making their own choices on daily matters, according to me this attitude provides to being a self-esteem person for a child. Additionally, they can have a skill of thinking and making a decision in difficult times. However, in my view, children need to their parents’ support because they are not enough old for making decisions. Therefore, children should not be allowed in order to make choices about matters that are significant for their life.

In conclusion, it is considered that giving a permission to children for making their own choices on daily routine issues (for instance food, costumes as well as entertainment) can cause being people who do not care of others’ thoughts. Besides, some people reckon that it is necessary for children to make decisions about important matters. According to me, making decisions behalf on the children is crucial because they are young and undeveloped for thinking truly.

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#2

Continuing the discussion from Can you give me band score for my essay?:

Hey there Torsten, I have read carefully your piece of writing and it is a thorough one on “Advantages and disadantages of sth”.

I’ll post back later during the week as on Monday I have to call back for that mock lesson to assign a day and hour though, he wanted me even to be on Monday but out of the blue I panicked tremendously/kept self-control during talk/ and then had lots of hedache attacks, my reflux started paining again and I was helpless even to practise nothing despite the fact I was looking foward to that email and call for a week. I’m so grateful I could talk to you even for a while. I remember every single word… However, on Monday everything will be clear, no later than the next day, I’ll have it, they cannot have so many classrooms open.
Good night
Kris }}

It’ s high time I started practising again.

Just to add. In Bugarian the highest score is “6” /2 - 6/, and / A +// /I am not flattering. I have no reason for that///

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#3

I don’t understand what you mean. I think your response is just irrelevant to my essay.

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#4

You need to rewrite the following part: ‘are lack of ability of thinking logically’ because it doesn’t make sense.

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#5

Continuing the discussion from Can you give me band score for my essay?:

Hi Memo
In fact you have an introductory passage I just ha ve forgotten. I saw those mistakes but you have a good balance between pros and cons, a few students are able to do it. Furthermore, you use nice linking words which is of.extreme significance.
when you write essays of this type. That is why I had put the highest score
As a teacher I never put a lower score for a few grammar mistakes.
So, think of " to lack sth and grammar of think_about/ of sth ,
sb." I made a typo in my last message typing…"think about/FOR sth.
Be happy with your learning

Kris

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#6

Thank you very much for your comments @Hristina-59.Varna

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#7

Hi, Torsten, Just to drop a line
The mock lesson is tomorrow/ 26th, Jan/ but:
It seems I had misunderstood or the boy had not clearly explained to me the lesson should go for an hour and a half and what I had prepared and memorized takes about 50 min
including questions, answers, some pieces of advice, some humour.
And now I have to include aditional material on usage of pr.s

  • 2 more tests so that it goes on for 90 min.
    However, it is good I know how long it should be otherwise it would be a great omission and make the lesson incomplete
    Then I would have lower chances. Well, each lesson is recorded but it stays in the system
    Anyway,I 'll see what I could do to record and send it to you.
    So I’ll be busy all day
    typing as the system does not allow me to upload screenshots as they are google protected but the examples are fine.
    So see you.
    Kris
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