Another Essay for IELTS. Please rate!

Many people use distance-learning programs (study material post, TV, Internet, etc) to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the same benefits of attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

History has proved that education is a cornerstone in the development of human beings. Along various educational institutions, distance learning programs are also getting popular among the students of 21st century. Although both of them have their own benefits and drawback, however, in my view, the benefits of getting education from a college or university are far more than that provided by virtual educational programs.

To begin with, getting into the college or university provides students with an opportunity to meet-up people with different backgrounds and nature. For instance, when I was enrolled in university, I remember there were students from different parts of the world with different cultural values. Hence, this kind of schooling grooms student’s skills of public relations and expand their scope.

Furthermore, by attending higher education institution people also get chance to participate in extra curriculum activities which are not possible otherwise. This benefit can be better understood by looking at various days of school’s calendar such as sports day, art day, music day, and other festival celebrations. These activities motivate students towards achieving their aims and establish a sense of competition. Hence, college or university grooms students in a better way when measured against the distance learning programs.

Last but not least, it is also seen that class room trainings are usually more affordable in comparison to the distance learning programs which have quite higher fee structure. For instance, one of my friends was enrolled in a bachelor program across the border while I was also doing BSC from a local college in my city. At that time she was paying almost twice for the same level studies as I was supposed to pay. Therefore, it is agreed by many people that learning in virtual educational institution is not economic compared to traditional education systems.

To conclude the above analysis, it is thus strongly believed that attending college or university outweighs the benefits of distance learning programs.

TOEFL listening lectures: What does DNA analysis reveal about the domestication of horses?

Hi Anna, I thought this was very good. Your have a great structure and you addressed the prompt well. Your examples were relevant, but your first body paragraph could have been a bit better. Your writing is clear and understandable, although you do have some minor errors here and there. Your vocabulary is a bit simple, with some repetitive words and you have some word choices that could be improved, but overall, a good essay. I would rate it a 4 out of 5.

Thanks lot my teacher!
Well, i am trying to improve my vocab. Can u tell me what can be IELTS band for this? I am really thankful for your help.

I think this would rate a band 6. Your content is good enough to get a 7, but with so many small errors, it would bring your score down.